Shadow
by NaTTyKiinz
Summary: It's only your shadow filling the room, arriving too late and leaving too soon.
1. Chapter 1

**Note: This story has been re-edited as of November 04, 2012. If you have read this story before, I have changed many things within this story from the original and I'd consider for it to be reread. My story also has a book trailer which you may find the link in _Chapter 16: A Few Words_. **

**Warning: **This story will contain some graphic scenes and strong language at the beginning of the story. Even though this is a romance novel, it has angst. This story is completed. This story does contain some graphic scenes that may be inappropriate for children under 13 years of age. There is some vulgar language, descriptions that may cause discomfort and mature situations. What makes a perfect love story is to have the reader feel like they are the characters and imagine what they would do in these difficult situations. My story might make you cry, angry, frustrated and completely in love. So please, don't bash. You've been warned.

(August 10, 2010)

**~Excerpt~**

"Let it go," Draco snarled. "If I'm not mistaken, you said so yourself that you wish to not waste a moments breath about what had happened."

He took a step closer to her, eying her up and down with his frozen gray eyes. "Or have you forgotten?"

Hermione bit the inside of her lip and straightened her shoulders in a form of defiance, even though she was nothing more than a wilting tree in comparison to a tower. She stared into his mysterious eyes and wondered if there were any possibilities of forgetting such an event.

Before she got a chance to reply, he aggressively pushed her shoulders. Hermione didn't even register the fact that her battered, brown books had fallen onto the floor. She was far too busy holding back her tears as Malfoy stared at her in disgust. She saw it all, just by looking into the silvers of his cold, dark eyes. Draco positioned his body over hers and held her firmly against the brick wall behind her. A scene like this made all the busy students walking to their next class, stop and watch.

Draco stared down at her with one of his hands on her shoulder and the other on the wall by her head. Since the moment he meet her, she always frustrated him badly. He had no choice but to be this assertive towards her.

"Just pretend it never happened," he gritted between his teeth. His face was too close to hers, making it harder for her to acknowledge all of the students staring at them. Whispers filled the corridor with unease; some debated whether to get an authority figure to break them apart or whether to get some popcorn and enjoy the show.

Hermione couldn't handle it in anymore and let a tear run down her cheek. "I can't," she whispered. "It's impossible to forget and I know that you can't either."

Draco glanced down at her. She was right, he too couldn't forget.


	2. Chapter 2

**Setting:** Seventh year, post battle of Hogwarts. The death of Dumbledore and the battle of Hogwarts were combined during the sixth year.

(August 11, 2010)

"Its only your shadow  
Never yourself  
Its only your shadow  
Nobody else  
Its only your shadow  
Filling the room  
Arriving too late  
And leaving too soon"  
_**Shadow- Britney Spears**_

Pitiful.

That's what described the scene down below.

Draco Malfoy brutally watched a herd of wild animals run after one feeble prey. In this case, Hogwarts was the prey and the returning students were the predators.

_Savages, all of them,_ he thought slyly.

He leaned against the astronomy tower's wall while turning his attention to the sunset before him. He felt the soft breeze hit his face; it was almost calming from all of the chaos he experienced last year.

It was his final year at Hogwarts and he expected it to go quickly. If it weren't for his mother who forced him to attend his last year, he'd be long gone from this treacherous place, the country even. Sixth year at Hogwarts was by far the worst of them all. He had to not only get the Death Eaters into the castle and kill Dumbledore, which lead to failure, but he had to fight in that bloody war. He's surprised that many parents still let their children attend Hogwarts even with Professor Dumbledore dead.

_No matter how wise, it was time for him to die, _Draco thought.

Professor Snape, on the other hand, did not die. Nagini may have bit Severus Snape, but if it weren't for Draco who casted a spell to eliminate the venom from his body, he would be dead. Draco looked down again and stifled a laugh at this sight while shaking his head.

"Don't you think you should be reuniting with your fellow peers?"

Draco didn't stop gazing out the balcony of the astronomy tower. It was the one place he liked in all of Hogwarts. It was where he could be alone and think his thoughts thoroughly.

"Did you hear me?"

"Of course I heard you, I'm not deaf," Draco said. He turned around and faced Professor Snape.

"Then, why are you still standing here?" Snape demanded while crossing his arms.

"Aren't you supposed to be helping the new students into the Great Hall?" Draco asked and turned his head back to the sunset.

"Be thankful I'm not giving you a year's worth of detentions for that profane mouth of yours. Now go!" Snape ordered.

With a groan, Draco leaned away from the wall and started to exit the astronomy tower. Professor Snape placed his hand on Draco's shoulder to stop him.

"Care to explain this ridiculous attire of yours," Snape said, eyeing his clothing.

Draco looked down at his black buttoned down suit and shrugged his shoulders. A robe no longer justified his presence, even if it embroidered the Slytherin crest. He was a man with power, why blend in when he could stand out.

He didn't need him to know his intentions. Allow people to wonder, it drives them mad.

**~o~**

"This is excruciating to watch," Pansy huffed beneath her breath. "I could care less if first years are sorted into our house."

Draco, Blaise and Goyle nodded their heads in unison as a first year walk over to the table. Finally, when the sorting was over and Headmistress Professor McGonagall finished her speech, they all continued eating the rest of their dinner.

"Him," Goyle said and pointed his finger at a black haired boy. "He is my first victim to torment this year."

Pansy rolled her eyes and shoved a plate of food towards Goyle.

"Eat this before you shove that kid down your throat," Pansy said. Goyle gave her a glare, but still took her plate of food.

Draco examined his group of friends. How on earth did he manage to become friends with these poor excuses of magical beings? Draco threw his napkin on his plate and got up.

"Where are you going?" Blaise wondered.

"Are you my father?"

"No."

"Then why are you asking?" Draco stormed off from the table leaving his closest friend in unease.

**~o~**

Hermione Granger sat at the Gryffindor table with Harry by her side.

She could tell that Harry was quite upset when Professor McGonagall was giving the welcome speech rather than Professor Dumbledore. It was going to be a lot of getting used to without Dumbledore around. Hermione softly stroked Harry's back which snapped him from his day dreaming. He gave her a small smile and returned to his eating.

"Merlin, Malfoy is such a creep," Ron said while looking past Hermione's shoulder. Hermione didn't bother turning around because she could care less about what Malfoy was doing. She despised the poor excuse of a man and never wanted to waste her breath on him.

"Why's that?" Harry asked. He too didn't bother turning around to see what Ron was looking at.

"He's just is. He looks evil, and the way he just stormed off like that," Ron said while returning back to his plate of food.

This time Hermione couldn't resist, she turned around and looked at the Slytherin table. Draco wasn't sitting at his usual spot next to Blaise but was walking down the pathway out of the Great Hall. He stood out almost instantly with his blond hair and by his attire. Draco turned around and stared dead at Hermione. She didn't turn around like how he expected but stared back. It felt like they looked at each other for hours but it only lasted a few seconds as Hermione nudged Harry in the shoulder.

"Don't you think you should follow him, Head Boy?" she said with a smile.

Harry turned around to look at Malfoy, but he was already out the door.

"What do you think he is up to?" Harry asked.

"Well, you'll never know if you don't find out," Ginny said.

Harry faced Ginny and held her hand.

"Its okay, what other trouble can he get into?" Harry told Hermione.

Hermione huffed as she looked at the last spot Malfoy stood. She knew he was capable of so much more.

**~o~**

Words cannot describe how much it infuriated him when that Mudblood looked at him.

How dare she let her filthy eyes look at him after what she had done to his father? Because of her, his father got sentenced to Azkaban for twenty five years.

_She will pay,_ he thought as he walked down the empty corridors, _she won't know what hit her._

"Malfoy, where do you think you're going? No one is allowed to be out of the Great Hall during the welcome feast," Hermione said as she stood behind Malfoy.

She gripped her wand from the inside of her robe as he turned around. His cold gray eyes flared and he wrinkled his nose by the sight of her as if she was nothing more than a piece of vermin. He took a couple of steps towards her and overall he looked dark and evil. Once he was a couple of feet in front of her, she couldn't help but feel small by his height.

Back at the table it seemed like a good idea to go follow Malfoy and see what he was up to, but after following him and seeing that he was just doing nothing, Hermione decided that she should confront him. But when he stopped and stood in front of her she couldn't stop the tiny feeling of fear that crawled up her spine.

"Then, why are you following me?" Draco sneered.

Hermione swallowed hard as she tried to think of a good remark, but it didn't come.

"Don't you have anything better to do than ruin my life?" Draco said darkly as he leaned down to her.

Hermione looked at his eyes, since they were so close to hers, and she could see her reflection in his pupils. He looked lifeless as she looked at the rest of his face. She wouldn't be surprised if all of the happiness was drained out of him this past summer.

"I didn't ruin your life, Malfoy. You did that simply on your own," Hermione said sternly, surprised how strong her voice sounded when she was all shaky in the inside.

Hermione saw his face tense up as she said those words. She immediately wanted to take them back. She didn't know how powerful Draco gotten and she didn't want to find out at this very moment. She heard rumors in the train ride over here that Draco Malfoy had learned dark spells from Voldemort himself and that many people now tried to stay out of his way not wanting to get him upset.

Hermione felt the tip of his wand touch her chest.

"You wouldn't dare Malfoy, not on school grounds," Hermione choked out.

Draco smirked at this fragile witch before him. Oh, how he truly wanted to wipe this filthy Mudblood off this earth right now.

"Honestly, Granger, you don't know what I would or wouldn't do."

It was now that Hermione pointed her wand at Draco's chest.

"You think your little spells could hurt me?" Draco nearly laughed as she dug her wand further into his chest.

"No Malfoy, I know," she simply stated.

"Crucio!" Draco yelled at Hermione.

"Stupefy!" Hermione managed to yell back.

Hermione fell on the floor as she clutched her body in pain. Memories flashed before her at the time when she was at the Malfoy Manor while Bellatrix tortured her. She couldn't believe that it was now Draco Malfoy who was doing this to her.

Hermione glanced up at Malfoy, expecting him to be out unconscious on the floor from her spell, but amazingly her wishes were dismayed. He stood next to her, glaring down at her with a menacing smirk plastered on his face. He wasn't affected at all.

She squeezed her eyes as the pain continued. There was no reason for her to ask him how he was unmarked, inside she already knew. Who else had a strong desire to become a death eater? Who else was studious enough to learn dark magic that no wizard would even dare lay their eyes on? Who else was keen enough to cast an unforgivable curse at his own peer? Draco Malfoy was truly unbreakable.

"Didn't you hear what people were saying about me, Granger?" Draco leaned down to one of his knees and looked at Hermione as tears filled her eyes from the pain she was experiencing. "I know magic that no students, or some professors, know about. Next time watch what you say or else I'll make it worse than how it is now."

Draco got up on his feet and walked away, leaving Hermione groaning on the floor in pain.

Hermione sat up on the floor and whipped away her tears as her pain finally stopped, and it only did when she saw the last glimpse of his shadow from the fired lanterns slowly disappear.

**Author's Note:** (Very Important) Most authors wouldn't say this on their very first chapter, but I believe it's fair for the readers to know. I am not a professional writer so I do make mistakes, especially grammatical ones. I do have a habit of switching present tense to past tense in a single paragraph and it annoys me just as much as it annoys you. So please, if you point it out, be nice about it. I am trying to fix that stupid habit. :)


	3. Chapter 3

(August 19, 2010)

"I am in misery  
There ain't no other  
Who can comfort me  
Why won't you answer me?  
Your silence is slowly killing me"  
_**Misery- Maroon 5 **_

Hermione held her books tightly to her chest as she rapidly walked down the darkened corridor.

Getting caught strolling around late at night by a prefect was not on her list. She rounded the corner and came to a complete halt. The sight before her, made her lips curl up in a snare, caused her eyes to glare darkly and her voice to scoff beneath her breath.

"Perfect, just what I needed," she muttered while turning around to lean against the wall. Hermione banged her head softly against her books and debated on what to do. What would one do, if they saw the devil himself roaming through the halls?

"Draco, don't leave."

Curiously, Hermione poked her head out from the corner and saw Pansy buttoning up her white blouse whilst catching up to Draco's fast pace. Pansy's appearance was highly unpleasing at that moment. Her hair that was once plaited into a perfect French braid was terribly undone, her blouse was not tucked in and her black robe was inside out. Hermione couldn't help but roll her eyes. Draco, on the other hand, was dressed handsomely, not a wrinkle in sight.

"What don't you understand?" Draco turned around and faced Pansy who bumped into his chest. "I have places to be."

"You wrote not a single letter to me this whole summer. Not to mention, you utterly ignored me since the battle last year." Pansy stopped playing with her blouse and reached out to grab his hand. "I miss you," she said with pleading eyes.

Draco forcefully shook her grasp away from his hand. Pansy opened her mouth in shock and then closed it angrily. "We finally had some alone time together and you ended it!"

"Things change, people change, feelings change," Draco snapped.

"If your feelings changed for me then why did you almost sleep with me back there?" Pansy nearly screamed while pointing her finger to a broom closet behind her.

Hermione couldn't help but snicker._ How romantic,_ she thought sarcastically.

"Like you said, I almost did until I realized that it was you who I was doing it with," Draco said coldly.

Pansy stood in front of him and for the second time was lost of words.

"You don't mean that," she said softly as she glanced down at her feet.

For a few moments, they stood in silence as Pansy's eyes began to water.

Just then, Hermione lost her grasp on her heavy books and they fell on the floor loudly. Hermione's heart started to beat a hundred miles per hour as she leaned back against the wall hoping that Draco didn't see her.

Unfortunately, Draco got a glimpse of her curly hair. He inhaled a deep breath and turned on his heels. He started to fix his tie while walking down the hall. Pansy followed Draco and gave a dry laugh at the sight of Hermione on her knees picking up the dropped books.

"You have no right to be spying on us, muggle born," Pansy said trying to hide her earlier emotions.

"I was not spying on you two. I have better things to do then watch you guys argue," Hermione said while picking up her last book on the floor.

"Like reading?" Draco said. He took a look at her then at her books. He hit her books and once again they were on the floor. Draco didn't move and stared down hard on her as Hermione looked down at her books in irritation.

"Parkinson, leave now," Draco ordered.

"What?"

"Now." Draco still didn't take his eyes off of Hermione. Hermione didn't bother looking up at Draco, she already knew he was glaring at her by the burning sensation she felt on top of her head.

Pansy hesitated not knowing if she should go, but then turned around and left the corridor annoyed.

Hermione knelt back down and picked up her first book while balancing herself with her other hand on the floor. She looked down at Draco's fancy black shoes, so shiny that she could see her reflection on them.

"Nobody likes nosy people," Draco said as he stepped on her fingers from her bare hand on the floor. Hermione screamed in agony as the pain from her fingers trailed all around her body.

"Look who's talking," Hermione managed to choke out. Draco snarled down at her and dug his foot harder on her fingers. She screamed once more and fell on the floor. Draco knelt down to her level and looked into her teary eyes.

"Haven't you learned from last time not to go near me?" Draco lifted his foot off her fingers and watched as Hermione touched her fingers.

"Once again, I wasn't spying on you. You just happened to appear," Hermione said while holding in her tears. The last thing she wanted was for him to think that she was weak.

Draco grabbed her shoulder and pushed her against the wall. Hermione groaned in pain as he squeezed her broken fingers.

"Dare you be smart with me?" Draco said while squeezing her hand harder. Hermione gasped in pain as the pain tingled throughout her body. She opened her mouth to scream but this time nothing came out. How can those breath taking gray eyes have so much evil and hatred in them. Hermione knew she was staring at those eyes, but she couldn't help herself.

"Oh, dear."

Startled from that sudden voice, Draco quickly let go of her hand and let it fall on the hard floor. Hermione pressed her lips together, muffling in a yell.

Professor McGonagall appeared by Draco's side looking down at Hermione's hand.

"What happened?" Professor McGonagall said in a panicked tone. She looked at Hermione's red face and then at Draco.

Draco straightened himself up and cleared his throat.

"I'm not sure. I found her here sitting by herself against the wall crying her eyes out while holding onto her hand."

Hermione looked up at Draco giving him death glares.

"It seems like she had a little accident," Draco said blankly.

Professor McGonagall looked at Draco, not quite believing him.

"Oh dear, come. We have to take you to the Hospital Wing. It looks like it could be broken," she said while taking one of Hermione's elbows, lifting her up.

Draco turned around without a word and stared to walk away.

"Mr. Malfoy, where do you think you're going?"

Draco didn't stop walking.

"Back to my common room," he said slightly.

"No you're not. Pick up those books and help me escort Ms. Granger."

**~o~**

"There you go, good as new," Madam Pomfrey said as she withdrew her wand from Hermione's hand.

Hermione wiggled her fingers and smiled up at Madam Pomfrey. Draco leaned against the wall from the opposite side of the room and crossed his arms. Instead of looking at Hermione, he was looking out at the rain through the window, dreading for this to be over already. He occupied his time by watching which rain drop on the window would fall to the bottom first. Would it be the small one that got knocked around from the big raindrops, or would the huge raindrop take control and lead the way?

"Now, I just have a quick question to ask you," Madam Pomfrey said while taking out her clipboard. "How did you injure your hand?"

Hermione hesitated for a brief moment and took a look at Draco. Should she tell the truth? Draco flicked his eyes towards her, warning her not to say anything and looked back at the window. _I suppose not_, she thought with a bicker.

"Well, it's an interesting story really. I was at the library, reading a book on the floor when all of the sudden a boy appeared out of nowhere and stepped on my hand." Hermione looked up at Madam Pomfrey hoping that she would buy that horrible lie. "I couldn't see the boy's face for he ran away when I screamed. My hand was hurting quite terribly that I decided I should go to the Hospital Wing to get it examined."

Madam Pomfrey tapped her quill against her mouth not believing a word of what she said. She took a glance at Draco and back at Hermione.

"Ms. Granger, if you are not telling me the truth and Mr. Malfoy did this to you, I think you should tell me," she whispered while leaning towards her, making sure that Draco didn't overhear.

Hermione quickly shook her head. "No honestly, that's what happened. Malfoy just happened to appear."

Madam Pomfrey shook her head and wrote down Hermione's lie on the clipboard.

"You're free to go," she said and disappeared into her office.

Draco instantly got off the wall and walked over to the door. Hermione grabbed her books and exited the room.

"What is your bloody problem, Malfoy?" Hermione screamed down the hall after Draco.

Draco stopped walking and turned around.

"You are my problem Mudblood."

Hermione leaned in closer to Draco leaving a few centimeters of space in between them.

"That's where you are wrong Malfoy. I'm not your problem. You just have a messed up life and it cheers you up when you see pain in everybody's faces," Hermione said bravely. Why was she standing up to Malfoy when she very well knew that he would most likely hurt her? She didn't know.

"No Granger, that's where you got it all wrong, soon you won't be my problem." Draco tucked his hands in his pockets and turned around not mentioning whether or not the second part of what Hermione said was true. A chill went down Hermione's spine as he said those words. She clutched her books closer to her as goosebumps covered her arms as she watched Draco walk away.


	4. Chapter 4

(September 05, 2010)

"So what if it hurts me?  
So what it I break down?  
So what if this world just throws me off the edge,  
My feet run out of ground  
I gotta find my place  
I wanna hear my sound  
Don't care about all the pain in front of me  
I just trying to be happy  
I just wanna be happy, yeah"  
_**Happy- Leona Lewis  
**_

"Soon you won't be my problem."

What did he mean by that?

Who could unravel such a statement?

Hermione hated admitting this to herself but as every day passed since the incident that led to the hospital wing, she got more and more frightened of Malfoy each day. Whenever he was near her she tried to avoid him. She had no idea that he would go to the extent of actually breaking her bones.

Hermione walked into her Advanced History of Magic class dreading the every step that she took. A certain Malfoy was almost in all of her classes even in the one she was walking into right now. It was her favorite class and he had to ruin it by being having his presence shown.

A Ravenclaw shoved Hermione forward and muffled out a weak sorry while taking his seat. She didn't even notice that she was blocking the doorway because she was in deep thought.

While keeping his head down, Draco looked up at Hermione with his eyes. Hermione grasped her books closer to her chest as he did that. She felt intimated every time he looked at her. She hated how he made her feel weak when she wasn't a bit.

"Ms. Granger?" Professor Binns said.

Hermione was startled by the voice calling her name and instantly started to blush as the professor motioned his hand towards her seat. Hermione nodded her head and walked down the only aisle she could go through to get to her seat, which involved walking by the serpent. She quickly walked down the aisle to get to her seat but instead of her butt reaching the chair, it reached the floor. Unfortunately, a book bag was blocking her way and she tripped over it sending her whole body down to the ground, and to make matters worse she fell right next to Draco. With her hair hiding her face, Hermione took in a deep breath to hide the frustration that was rapidly overtaking her. _He tripped me with his book bag!_ she thought. Hermione got off from the ground and stared down at Draco who was looking at her with amusement.

"Must you torture me in every way possible?" she said through her teeth. Draco's smirk went away and he got up from his seat in a hurry. Now, he was looking down at her.

"Are you truly asking me that question? Haven't you known me for the past six years?" He took a step towards her. "I despise you Granger. You are a worthless soul in this world. I am doing a favor from Merlin himself. To answer your question, yes Mudblood, I must torment you until I never have to see your face again," he growled.

Draco moved his hand under his suit and withdrew his wand pointing directly at Hermione. The room grew silent and watched in tension at them; even Professor Binns didn't dare make a move.

Hermione's pulse started to fasten as she looked from his wand to his face. He wasn't bluffing. But would he dare case another unforgivable curse at her in the presence of a teacher? Some would debate no, but at the back of her head something told her that he would. She hated when he tried to overpower her. She is Hermione Granger after all. It was time for her to stand her ground.

"If you hate me that much, then just ignore me. Better yet, pretend I'm not even alive. You're just wasting your time on me because you can't break me Malfoy. Nothing will make me fall down on my knees and follow your every command. I'm stronger than that," she said.

"Stronger than the Cruciatus Curse?" Draco scoffed.

"You wouldn't dare," Hermione whispered harshly.

"Crucio," Draco said simply.

A power within her, forced Hermione down to her knees in intensified pain. She formed her lips into a thin line to muffle out her screams but he was too powerful.

"Draco Malfoy, stop it this instant," Professor Binns ordered but stood where he was.

Draco ignored the professor and kneeled down by Hermione. "Why couldn't you die in the battle last year? It would have made my life so much easier," he whispered to her ear. His tone was dark and Hermione shivered once again after what came out of his mouth.

"Because I'm indestructible Malfoy, not even you could hurt me as badly as you want to," she replied. "Your spells overpower me physically, but my soul is mine to control."

Draco stared at this girl in front of him, baffled at who she has become. He didn't know this side of the Mudblood, just the one that hid herself behind her books. Who knew she was tough as stone.

Hermione picked herself off the ground and picked up her fallen books. With her hand over her stomach, she took one last look at Draco and walked out of the classroom.

Draco was impressed. He turned around and faced the students who quickly took a step away from him.

"Obliviate," he said and pointed his wand to the class, including the professor.

**~o~**

"I heard Malfoy was giving you a hard time again," Harry said while strolling along with Hermione around Hogwarts during nightfall. Hermione had a lot on her mind and couldn't endure being surrounded by four walls for another minute. So she decided that she would help Harry with his nightly rounds around Hogwarts.

Hermione sighed and picked up a dandelion off from the grass.

"When is he not?" Hermione said while twirling the stem between her fingers.

"Have you forgotten about the relationship I have with him? Do you know how many times I have to hear him taunt me every day? But do you know what I do, I ignore him. I think you should start doing the same," Harry said.

Hermione kept on twirling the flower in between her fingers.

"Why can't we all just be civil with each other? The war is over; this should be a happy time for everybody."

Harry stopped walking and faced his best friend.

"Hermione, this is Malfoy we're talking about."

"Yeah, I suppose you're right." Hermione stopped playing with the flower. She made a wish in her head and blew on the flower. The dandelion's seeds flew all over the place and she watched in amazement as they did so.

After the walk with Harry, Hermione sneaked her way back to the common room and tried her best not to make any noise to wake the other sleeping girls. It was as if that every step she took, a connon went off in the room.

She dug through her drawers and took out a long silk crème colored sleeping gown that her mother gave her for Christmas last year. It was her favorite pajamas because it formed her curves nicely and the way it felt on her skin was nice. After finishing her usual nightly routine in the bathroom she climbed into bed. A thud echoed against the walls that nearly scared her to death when she kicked something off her bed. Hermione closed her eyes shut, hoping that nothing bad had happened. When she finally opened them she noticed that the other girls were still sleeping. She leaned over the side of her bed to see what fell. A box had fallen of her bed and pieces of candy was scattered across the floor.

"What?" she muttered softly.

She got out of her bed and knelt down on her knees to pick up the chocolate. After picking up every piece, she lifted up the box and found two notes on the floor. _This came for you_, was inscribed in one note while the other was in a tiny envelope. Hermione opened it up and read what it said.

_Saw that you were having a rough week; here is some chocolate to ease your day. _

Hermione looked down at the chocolate like she never saw chocolate in the life. Who would buy her chocolate? Hermione placed all the pieces back into the box, got on her feet and walked over to the trashcan by a table. She wasn't stupid, mysterious chocolate appearing in her room meant that it was either charmed and something bad would happen. She held the box with the note over the trashcan, hesitating while eyeing the chocolate. It was a little past midnight and she couldn't help but crave for that chocolate. Hermione closed her eyes and dropped the box in the trashcan and ran to her bed.

Hermione lay on her bed, wrapped herself with her covers, and stared at the ceiling. The chocolate was taunting her. Hermione couldn't resist. She got out of bed and walked over to the trashcan. She picked up a piece of chocolate that was still in the box and held it in her hand. Why is it that girls uncontrollably crave chocolate? Hermione closed her eyes and popped the chocolate in her mouth. Her craving was eased down and warmth flowed through her body. She picked up the box from the trashcan and ate the rest of the chocolate while sitting in the middle of her bed. As Hermione licked her fingers, she examined the box to see what made this chocolate so good.

Hermione turned the box over and dropped it immediately whole running to the trashcan to spit out the leftover chocolate in her mouth. She started to cough uncontrollably and her head became dizzy. She glanced down at the box and the blood red letters forming the words, _good riddance_, danced in circles.

_Don't say a word, walk out of your room and don't stop until you have reached the astronomy tower, _a voice inside of her head said.

Hermione struggled against her body, trying her hardest not to leave the room but she couldn't. She felt her eyes water as she walked past her sleeping roommates unable to scream or yell for help.

She walked in a daze towards the unknown.


	5. Chapter 5

(September 19, 2010)

"Touch me I'm cold, unable to control  
Touch me I'm golden and wild as the wind blows  
And tumbling tumbling, don't go fascination  
If just for tonight darling, let's get lost  
If just for tonight darling, let's get lost  
Let me come closer, I'm not your shadow  
With our eyes shielding from the oncoming counts  
It's not hard for us to say what we should not"  
_**Let's Get Lost- Beck and Bat For Lashes**_

Hermione took a step onto the cold floor with her bare feet, each step reaching closer to her death.

She knew this because the voice in her head told her. Not only was it telling her how she'll encounter death, but also how atrocious she was. Hermione wasn't stupid; she already had a good idea on who she was doing this. Who else wanted her gone more than anything in the entire world, who hated her guts since day one and informed her every day how much, no one other than Draco Malfoy.

There were numerous of times when she could have got caught for wondering the halls this late at night but somehow she did. She could have had a huge red arrow pointing at her but no one would give the slightest glance towards her direction. She reached the staircase that led to the astronomy tower. She resisted taking another step forward and for once the voice inside her head let her. She looked up at the many steps spiraling their way upwards. For many years, she always wondered how she was going to die. Throughout the years with Harry and Ron she wouldn't be surprised if she died the next day because of Voldemort. But when he died, she hadn't thought once about death knowing that her life was hers now and she could finally enjoy it without fear lurking in every corner. Now as she looked up at the astronomy tower, she knew that this was the end. Tears started to fall and once again, against her very will, she climbed up the staircase that was leading her to her death. She felt like she wasn't in her body. The physical part of her was there but her inner soul was being taken away from her.

_If you stop resisting me, this could all go very quickly and you won't feel a thing. You don't want to feel pain when you die do you? _the voice told her.

She reached the end of the staircase and felt a breeze move past her body sending goosebumps up and down her bare skin. She didn't want her life to end like this. She imagined herself ten years from now with a husband that cared for her and children that she adored, not her body rotting in a grave. She struggled to take back her control of her body but failed in every way possible.

It was a night that was beautiful in every way. A full moon shined above her with upcoming rain clouds in the distant, stars twinkled like there was no tomorrow and the wind danced past her ears singing a song that only it understood. Her numb feet took her to the edge of the balcony where she saw an exquisite view of the lake below her. The water reflected the shy as if it was the sky and it didn't move the slightest bit even with the breeze that danced around her. The scenery took her breath away and in any moment it would. She couldn't help but stop that horrible feeling inside of her as she took another glance down. She wasn't scared of heights. Take her to the highest skyscraper in the world and she won't be a tad bit nervous. What she feared was falling down the height especially when there was nobody to catch her at the end.

"No!" Hermione screamed as her feet stepped on the lowest bar of the balcony. She began to sob as her feet moved on their own. "Please, please," she murmured while keeping her eyes shut. Hermione took a deep breath and used all of the strength she had and pushed her self away from the balcony. She landed on the floor a few feet away and crawled her way back to the staircase, but was unable to stand up. As her finger tips reached the bricked staircase the voice in her head took control of her once again.

_I control you now, _it growled.

Hermione covered her ears trying to block out the screaming. She stood up and her body walked back to the balcony.

**~o~**

Draco stared up at the ceiling in front of him. He took in a deep breath, already irritated because he couldn't seem to fall asleep. Draco rolled out of bed and grabbed his coat. If he couldn't sleep, he might as well do something interesting other than counting the ceiling tiles.

Draco walked down the corridors with his hands in his pocket and his head in a daze. He was clueless to his surrounds and because of that he bumped into the wall a few times. He stopped dead in his tracks as he saw a silhouette of a girl turning the corner to his direction. Draco climbed up the small step by the window, hiding himself from her. He starred at the girl who walked right pass him. She caught his attention in a heartbeat. She was dressed in a long silky night gown that he couldn't help but look at all of her curves, her hair was down her back in a curly mess, her body moved in a motionless movement like she was walking on thin air and her face was blank that covered up every emotion inside of her. What really struck him was how beautiful she was, though it frightened him with the name that represented the girl. Hermione Granger.

"Granger," Draco mumbled to himself as he watched her turn the corner leading towards the astronomy tower. He got off the ledge and followed her around the corner. He stopped dead in his tracks when she was just a few feet ahead of her, standing looking up at the staircase. She looked up at it like she saw it for the very first time and it seemed to scare her. Draco looked closely at her and noticed that she was hesitating whether or not to go up. Finally, yet very slowly, she walked up the staircase. Draco picked up his pace and followed her up leaving a good distance between them.

Draco abruptly stopped again as he saw Hermione standing in the entryway. He leaned down to his knees trying to make himself less noticeable. He heard whimpers escape her mouth as he watched her walk towards the balcony. Draco arched his eyebrow trying to understand what the hell she was doing. He walked to the entryway of the staircase where she once stood and leaned against the wall while staring at her as she held the bar before her. For a few moments, he watched her stare out of the balcony. Then all of the sudden, she pushed herself away from the balcony and fell on the floor. Draco scrambled to his feet as she started to crawl her way to the staircase. He ran to the spot that blocked him from her view but he still saw everything so clearly.

The sight before him would have scared the Dark Lord himself from the way she crawled with her hair completely covering her face. He held his breath when she finally reached the threshold of the stairway, hoping that she couldn't see him.

A scream escaped her mouth that sent his ears ringing as she somehow got up on her feet. He watched in confusion as she moved back to the balcony in a struggle. It looked like she was struggling with herself. The wind was blowing her hair in all kinds of directions and the fabric around her legs swirled to show her legs. Draco couldn't help but gasp as she climbed the balcony. He got out of the staircase and walked against the bricked wall to see closely to what she was going to do. Hermione got one of her legs over the bar and now she was standing on the little cement ledge only inches in width as she held on firmly on the balcony bar.

_Holy shit, she's going to jump!_ he thought.

**~o~**

Hermione's brown curls danced in the wind as she held onto the bar. She looked down below her and quickly leaned back while shutting her eyes. _Oh, this is high, too high,_ she thought.

She took in a deep breath, trying to calm herself down, while tears streamed down her cheeks. Blisters formed on her hands from holding onto the metal bar so tightly and the bare arch of her feet started to ache from the bottom bar. Hermione looked up at the full moon that shined above her and the stars that twinkled endlessly. _You're a girl that no one cares about, why is your life worth living for? _The voice told her as she loosened her fingertips. Y_ou just cause trouble to every single person you meet. I bet if you died, no one would even notice._ Hermione shook her head from those menacingly thoughts that kept popping into her head. She felt her heart pound against her chest as her fingertips loosened. She really didn't want to do this, but she couldn't stop.

"Don't do it!"

The sudden voice startled her and she quickly held the bar more firmly to keep her from losing her balance. She didn't around to see who it was because deep down she knew it would be too late. Nobody could save her from this.

"Stop!"

She closed her eyes just as a gust of wind aimed at her. She felt the loose fabric from her nightgown swirl around her legs. Not only was the wind making this hard for her, but also the stranger that kept on trying to stop her. She didn't want to commit suicide.

Draco moved closer to Hermione while extending his hand. He wasn't aware of his actions. Why would he, out of all the people, try to stop her from dying when he was the one that wanted her dead in the first place? Draco couldn't understand this but somehow he couldn't let her die. He stood behind her with the metal bar in between them.

_No one could stop you from this. One,_ Hermione's fingers started to part away from the bar. _Two,_

"No!" Hermione shrieked. Her scream made Draco's ears ring with agony.

"Granger, stop this nonsense. If you don't, I'll push you down myself for being so bloody ignorant," Draco said trying to make his voice be heard from all of the screaming. He placed his hand on her shoulder to show her he was right there.

_Three._

Hermione's fingers slipped off the bar and she felt herself fall. Hermione shut her eyes and awaited death.

A minute or so had passed and Hermione began to wonder why she wasn't dead yet. The astronomy tower was only twenty five stories high, the fall would only last a couple of seconds which meant she should be dead.

"Granger!" A voice bellowed in the distance.

Hermione looked up and saw a man who moved his mouth, but she couldn't understand a thing. After a few moments his face came into focus and she saw who it was. Draco Malfoy. She looked up at him in shock, why was he here? Hermione looked down expecting to see the ground, but instead she was in the air. The beautiful night that was once before turned into a nightmare as rain poured down causing her body to soak. Hermione screamed and looked back up at Draco. He was struggling and screamed down at her while holding onto to a hand, her hand. Finally, everything made sense, he was going to kill her himself.

"Malfoy, don't do this! Nothing good will come out with me dead!" she screamed. Draco looked at her like she was crazy; did she really think that he was going to kill her? He was the one that was saving her.

"Damn it," he grunted as her hand started to slip from his, the rain making everything much harder to do.

"Malfoy, don't let me fall!" Hermione pleaded while tears streamed down her face.

"Merlin, Granger, I'm not going to let you die, just help me save you!" Draco screamed back as beads of sweat started to form on his forehead. Hermione grabbed his other hand that he extended out towards her.

Hermione stepped on the tower's wall to climb herself up while Draco pulled her up. She kept slipping from all if the running rain but she kept on trying. Very slowly they were making progress.

Hermione reached the metal bar of the balcony and steadied herself on the ledge. Draco grabbed her around the waist and picked her up, but with a loss of balance they both fell backwards onto the balcony floor away from the bar.

Hermione closed her eyes and buried her face into his shoulder, not caring for the slightest second to whom she was doing this to for she needed a moment to calm herself down. Draco lay under her, debating whether or not to push her off of him. He chose not to. He didn't know what to say, or better yet he didn't know what to do. He was confused about everything. Why the hell was he the one that had to save her, why was she still holding on to him when she specifically knew who he is, and why the hell did he not push her away at this very instant.

"What the bloody hell were you thinking?" Draco asked.

Hermione picked her head up from his shoulder and looked into his gray eyes.

"What the hell I was thinking? I should be asking you that question!" Hermione stuttered from the cold.

"Why the fuck should I answer that? You're the one that was about to commit suicide by jumping off the tower!"

"You forced me to do it," Hermione screamed while holding herself up with her hands by his head.

"You're delusional. I can't believe you're blaming all of this on me when I was the one that saved your insignificant life!" Draco rolled his body over and faced Hermione who was beneath him.

"Saved my life? You wanted me dead. You poisoned my body so that you could control me and watch my own death! That's foul Malfoy, even for you," Hermione screamed frantically.

"Bloody hell, you're delusional. Let me make this very clear," he said while locking his eyes with hers. "You tried to go bye bye, but I go save you. Did I make myself clear?"

Hermione arched her eyebrow at him.

"Speak proper English Malfoy, I'm not three." Hermione tried to get away from underneath him but she was trapped. Somehow a spark of fear crawled up her spine and it wasn't because she thought he was going to hurt her again, but because she didn't know what was coming next.

"Why?" she whispered.

"Why what?"

"Why did you save me?"

Draco swallowed hard, he himself tried to decipher that very question. Hermione looked at him and she knew he didn't know by the confusion that struck his face. The rain still poured down at them and droplets from his hair were falling down on her face. At that very moment, he didn't seem to be that mean, arrogant, selfish child that everyone knows he was. To see, just for a moment, how truly vulnerable he was; she knew that he was nothing but a lost soul roaming around the corridors at night. He had nothing figured out.

Hermione did something that she never though in a million things she would ever do. She leaned forward and kissed him.

Draco was stunned by her actions and it took him a moment to realize what the hell was going on. If it were another day, he would've hexed her soul of this Mudblood for even thinking about kissing him, but now he just let her kiss him and shortly after he began to do the same. His body seemed to have swept aside the logical part of his mind. Control it, in fact. He slid his hands up her neck and behind her head. He lifted her slightly and the kiss became much more heated. His pulse pounded so hard that people miles away could hear it. He didn't know why he wanted to kiss her back, he just did. The kiss seemed more real than he has ever had with Pansy. It was filled with desire that he never experienced and that just made him want to kiss her more.

Hermione let all thoughts from her mind clear out. She didn't know why she made the move of kissing Draco. She just had to. With that very moment, she was glad she did. His body pressed against hers and somehow she couldn't help but smile within. Who knew that out of all people, the two individuals who despised each other for years were kissing?

Draco softly moved his hand to cup her chin and stopped kissing her. He gently moved his thumb over her pink lips and frowned as he looked into her eyes. Silence filled the air, other than the rain, as they stared at one another, debating on whether to continue. Draco couldn't handle it any longer and kissed her intoxicating lips once again. He knew he'll regret this in the morning, but that thought got pushed aside.

"What the bloody hell is going on here!"

Hermione quickly stopped kissing him and closed her eyes. Draco didn't need to turn around to see who it was, he already could tell by the voice. If his calculations were correct, it was Professor Snape who stood by the stairway witnessing such a tragic scene.

Draco formed his lips into a thin line while looking up at his Professor, who most surely didn't look pleased.

"Well?" Professor Snape bellowed.

Draco got up off of Hermione, who was covering her face with her hair, and stood before her. He instantly felt mortified for kissing Granger and the last thing he wanted was for Severus Snape to know.

"Malfoy, do you know what bloody time it is?"

"Don't you have a watch in your pocket? There's no need to be asking me," Draco replied coldly. Professor Snape took a step forward and saw a person standing behind Draco.

"You're fooling around with Ms. Granger?" Snape asked, too shocked to say anything else.

_Oh God, I think I would rather die now,_ Hermione thought as she started to blush.

Professor Snape snarled at Malfoy and Hermione and pointed towards the staircase. Draco walked down the staircase behind Hermione who folded her arms over her chest while looking down at the ground, humiliated in every way possible. Hermione slowed down and let Draco catch up to her. Once he was standing right by her, she made sure Snape was nowhere near listening distance.

"Let's pretend none of this ever happened," she whispered and ran down the corridor before Draco had a chance to respond.

Draco stopped walking and watched her run. Was it even possible for anyone to forget such an event? As he turned around, he saw a cloaked silhouette of a person by the staircase. When he took a step towards it, it disappeared.

Professor Snape appeared behind Draco and hit him by the head. "Go back to your common room, so I could pretend that the sickening scene I saw before me never happened," he scoffed and looked at Draco in disgust.

_If only I could do the same_, he thought.


	6. Chapter 6

(October 17, 2010)

"Outside the rain's falling down  
There's not a drop that hits me  
Scream at the sky but no sound  
Is leaving my lips  
It's like I can't even feel  
After the way you touched me  
I'm not asleep but I'm not awake  
After the way you loved me  
I can't turn this around  
I keep running into walls that I can't break down  
I said I just wander around  
With my eyes wide shut because of you  
I'm a sleepwalker walker walker walker"  
**_Sleepwalker- Adam Lambert_**

He watched her from afar.

He noticed every little thing she did that so many would take no notice of. Hermione walked down the crowded corridor with a book to her nose. Draco stopped walking and leaned against the wall to examine her. He stared at Granger's eyes moving rapidly from left to right on the page of her book. She was too oblivious to notice him doing so. How could she have survived the war being so bloody oblivious? Still, he couldn't help but look at her. Her smooth hair fell down past her chest, her face set in concentration, and her body walking in a lyrical dance. There was something about her, though he couldn't put his mind to it.

Four days had passed since their kiss and still to this day it was on constant reply in his mind like a broken record. It confused the hell out of him. How could he, Draco Malfoy, even let a Mudblood touch him? Draco took in a deep breath, closed his eyes, and hit his head against the wall softly. She really confused the fuck out of him and he loathed that. To everyone else, she was this innocent girl, but from that night he started to highly doubt that. He opened his eyes and there she was still walking towards him with a book to her nose. Draco straightened himself up and fixed his attire once she was near.

"Granger," he said.

Hermione stopped walking and raised her eyes from her book. She took in a quick breath and looked at Draco's stunning features.

"Yes," she replied shyly.

She didn't know what had overcome her that other night. So many feelings were mixed inside of her that she just lost it. The scene was something that she would consider out of a romance novel she had read over the summer. Now, whenever she saw him she couldn't stop the fluttering feeling inside her stomach to disperse. He was different to her now; the fog filled with false pretense and hatred had faded away from his personality. She closed her book and pressed it against her chest. She had done her hardest to avoid Draco as much as possible, but surely it wasn't enough. This was the first time they talked to each other or even acknowledged each other since the night at the astronomy tower.

"I should have let you fall," he said sternly.

Hermione was taken aback. "What?" she whispered.

"If I did, then the kiss wouldn't have happened. I have a reputation to uphold in this world. Even speaking with you ruins my stance in society."

Hermione parted her lips in shock. How could he say such things? "I never asked you to kiss me back, Malfoy. It's not my fault that your hormones wouldn't corporate with your better judgment," Hermione huffed.

"How could a man stop himself from someone so tempting?" Draco blurted out.

Hermione's cheeks turned scarlet and glanced down to the ground. "You found me alluring?" she asked softly.

Draco looked at her with such fiery. Did she think that someone like him went around kissing girls who were truly gruesome?

"You assume I roam around kissing trolls?" Draco nearly yelled. "Were you always this insecure?"

Hermione didn't say anything and looked down at her feet. Draco locked his hands behind his head and turned away from her. He took a couple of deep breaths to calm himself down. He didn't even know what he was so angry about.

"You don't scare me Malfoy, at least not anymore," she muttered.

"Excuse me?" Draco asked while turning his head to face her.

"If you wanted me dead, you would've just let me jump, but you didn't." Hermione took a few steps towards him. "You saved me. Out of all the people in this whole school, you're the one that saved me. Not Harry, not Ron. You did."

"This is where you are wrong, Granger. I can, and I will hurt you. What happened before doesn't change anything between me and you. Now if you're still not convinced then irritate me a bit more and I'll show what I really am capable of doing to you," Draco said while walking closer to her.

Hermione didn't know what she was doing. Of course Draco would hurt her, it would be ridiculous he if he didn't. But in the back of her mind she knew that someday he wouldn't.

"You're not who you pretend to be deep down. I can see through this little role you put up for a show." Hermione bit the inside of her lip. When will she learn to keep her mouth shut?

"You know nothing of who I am!" Draco yelled. "Just because we shared one moment of affection doesn't mean you know me."

Hermione stood her ground as he walked up to her with his hands clamped into fists. Students jumped out of his way, not wanting to be caught in between their fight.

"Forget about that night. Nothing will come between you and me. Let it go," Draco snarled. "If I'm not mistaken, you said so yourself that you wish to not waste a moments breath about what had happened."

He took a step closer to her, eying her up and down with his frozen gray eyes. "Or have you forgotten?"

Hermione bit the inside of her lip and straightened her shoulders in a form of defiance, even though she was nothing more than a wilting tree in comparison to a tower. She stared into his mysterious eyes and wondered if there were any possibilities of forgetting such an event.

Before she got a chance to reply, he aggressively pushed her shoulders. Hermione didn't even register the fact that her battered, brown books had fallen onto the floor. She was far too busy holding back her tears as Malfoy stared at her in disgust. She saw it all, just by looking into the silvers of his cold, dark eyes. Draco positioned his body over hers and held her firmly against the brick wall behind her. A scene like this made all the busy students walking to their next class, stop and watch.

Draco stared down at her with one of his hands on her shoulder and the other on the wall by her head. Since the moment he meet her, she always frustrated him badly. He had no choice but to be this assertive towards her.

"Just pretend it never happened," he gritted between his teeth. His face was too close to hers, making it harder for her to acknowledge all of the students staring at them. Whispers filled the corridor with unease; some debated whether to get an authority figure to break them apart or whether to get some popcorn and enjoy the show.

Hermione couldn't handle it in anymore and let a tear run down her cheek. "I can't," she whispered. "It's impossible to forget and I know that you can't either."

Draco glanced down at her. She was right, he too couldn't forget.

"Then what do you want me to do?" he said in surrender.

Hermione opened her eyes and parted her lips to speak, but nothing came out. Draco relaxed his hand from a fist and softened his touch on her shoulder. _Seriously, what is happening to me? I'm not my normal self around this girl,_ Draco thought.

Hermione went on her toes to reach his height and parted her lips once again. "I want you to kiss me."

Draco looked at her in confusion. _What?_ he thought.

Hermione searched his eyes not knowing if he was going to do it or not. He was so hard to understand that she didn't even know what was going through his mind when she said that. Then again, she was clueless herself as to why she even asked.

Draco couldn't help but smirk at the sight before him. Hermione felt her heart drop. _Of course he wouldn't kiss me_, she thought. She looked away from him trying to hide her embarrassment.

He lifted his hand off the wall and with his fingers, he gently lifted her chin. He leaned in and kissed her. Gasps erupted through the hall and nobody could believe the sight before them. Hermione folded her hands around his neck and kissed him back. Her stomach started to flutter uncontrollably, never did she ever have that feeling with Ron, and somehow she was glad.

Draco stopped kissing her and looked into her eyes, not knowing why he compromised. Hermione hid her smile by forming a thin line with her lips. She knelt down, picked up her book and went under his arms to get out of his reach. Draco still had his hands on the wall and looked to his right to watch Hermione's back as she walked away from him as the crowd parted before her. He took in a deep breath and faced the open mouth students staring at him in awe.

"You have ten seconds to get away from my sight before I cast a menacing curse on those who are left wandering," he said sternly.

The crowd didn't move.

"One," he started to count.

Just like that the whole crowd disappeared before he could count to two. Draco walked the opposite direction from the others and for the first time he felt like he had no direction onto where he was going this year.


	7. Chapter 7

(November 07, 2010)

"I'm crying out, I'm breaking down,  
I am fearing it all,  
Stuck inside these walls,  
Tell me there is hope for me  
Is anybody out there listening?Can't you hear my call?  
Are you coming to get me now?  
I've been waiting for,  
You to come rescue me,  
I need you to hold,  
All of the sadness I can not,  
Living inside of me"  
_**I'm In Here- Sia**_

"Hermione, this has to be some bloody joke!"

Hermione continued walking to class, ignoring the outburst from behind. Students parted before her, allowing her to pass while sending daggers through her soul. Ever since the kiss with Malfoy, that was all students talked about. Even the professors looked peculiarly at her. Footsteps echoed against the weary walls, rampaging towards her and then finally stopped as they caught up to her pace.

"Harry, how kind of you to stalk me," she said weakly when he ran in front of her. Harry glared down at her and shook his head, knowing that the rumor was true.

"How could you let this happen, Malfoy of all people? I thought you were smarter than this. This man is the essence of evil. The things he has done are unspeakable. He holds resemblance of the defeated Dark Lord. He is trouble Hermione, stay away from him," Harry scolded.

Harry was right. She should keep her distance from him, but how can she? Feelings have already developed; he was constantly on her mind and that kiss, who could deny such a kiss? Hermione sighed and debated what to say. Harry opened his mouth to speak once again but then closed it and averted his glare behind Hermione. Strong arms grabbed Hermione arms and pulled her away. Hermione gasped and looked up to find Draco shooting bullets to Harry's head.

"Malfoy, what are you doing?" Hermione asked but there was no reply for he was having a glaring contest with Harry. Hermione turned around in his arms and placed her hands on his chest. "Malfoy?" she whispered.

Draco broke the gaze and looked down at her shaking his head. He formed his lips into a thin line and his eyes were filled with struggle. "Never mind," he whispered back hesitantly and walked away with his hands in his pockets.

Hermione stood in the corridor with her head in a daze. "Hermione let's go, before we're late to class," Harry said while taking her hand and leading her to class.

**~o~**

Whispers followed him where ever he went. He was used to it though; he went through his whole life with people talking about him. This, to him, was second nature. But out of all the things people said about him he had never thought in his whole life that Granger would be the reason for it.

_What the bloody hell am I doing? Why did I kiss Granger in front of everyone? Damn Malfoy, you are losing it. Since when do you let one girl mess with your mind like that?_ he thought.

Draco stopped walking down the crowded hallway and punched his fist into the wall. Pain ran through his hand and everyone froze watching him cautiously. He kept a blank face not caring that he left a dent in the wall. He leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes.

He felt the eyes of everyone burning into this face. A moment later her opened his eyes and surely enough people where staring at him. He straightened up and glared at everyone motioning them that if they didn't leave they would regret it. Everyone got the idea and scrambled along while each of them whispered something into each other's ears while turning their head slightly to look at Draco.

The bell rang indicating that classes started but Draco didn't move an inch. He didn't want to go to Professor Snape's class especially since Granger was in it. Draco walked the opposite way from class and headed to the lake. _I need to end this. Granger and I aren't supposed to happen_, he thought.

He kicked the pile of dry leaves in front of him and kept walking until he was by a tree that could hide him from Hogwarts. He sat down on the crunchy leaves and watched the lake. Flashbacks came and went through his mind, good but mostly bad. Like the times his father punished him physically and emotionally; the images of Lord Voldemort from last year; the look of his father's face when Aurors came to take him away; the sorrow on his mother's face when she thought that he was dead; Professor Snape's lifeless body when Nagini bit him; the fear on Hermione's face when she was holding onto the bar of the ledge; her seductive face when she kissed him for the first time; the hot rainy scene of them at the tower; Hermione's sad face when she though that he wasn't going to kiss her when she asked him to this morning. Draco shook his head and stared at the afternoon sun. Skipping classes the whole day wasn't part of his routine but what else could he do when so many things were running through his mind.

_This is bad, really bad. Even if I consider letting Granger be anything with me, she won't know what she will be getting herself into. Doesn't she know who I am? Doesn't she remember all of the pain I caused her? I can't be with her, it just can't happen,_ he thought. Draco got up off the ground and walked back to Hogwarts. The halls were empty and the sound of his shoes echoed from the walls. He walked to his potions class and walked in without missing a beat.

The room quickly became quite and students stopped what they were doing

"Malfoy, explain to the class why missing half of my class was important to you," Professor Snape sneered and stopped writing on the chalkboard.

Draco stopped walking and took a look at Snape then at the class. He looked at everyone's eyes and stopped when he met Hermione's.

"Because I have better things to do than waste my time with non-worthy beings including a certain Mudblood," Draco said clearly so that everyone heard. He still looked at Hermione and he saw how hurt she was by his words. The classroom looked at one another and then back at Hermione.

"Malfoy, a word," Snape said.

"No, I believe that is unnecessary."

"Now," Professor Snape snapped.

Draco took his eyes off of Hermione and quickly looked at the rest of the unspoken class. He turned around and followed Snape out of the room.

"What?" Draco asked.

"How dare you miss half of my class and disrupt it with your vulgarity?" he asked.

Draco looked at Snape with no pity. "Because I can," Draco stated.

Snape was taken aback. "Excuse me?" he snarled. "Malfoy, don't ruin the last chance you get. Be thankful for once in your life that you're not dead, didn't end up like your beloved father and that you got one more chance to fix things right," Snape screamed to his face while holding his shoulders.

Students stood by the doorway eager to hear what was going on. Hermione sat down in her chair silently. She didn't need to be by the door to hear the conversation. She perfectly heard every word from where she was sitting. After all, Snape and Draco where talking way too loudly for the whole world to hear.

"Fix what Snape? My life is over; I have nothing left to live for. People know what I was and what I still am, there's no need for me to prove any of them wrong! I have money; I have better education than all of these students combined. I don't need any of them when this year is over; all they'll ever be is a faded memory. This place is dead to me and the people in it!" Draco bellowed knowing he had lost his temper once again.

Everyone turned around and looked at the only girl that was sitting in a desk. Hermione looked back at them but her mind was somewhere else. _He doesn't mean that. How can he say that after what we have been through, after that kiss? He doesn't mean that, he doesn't mean that, _she thought, but deep down she knew he was right.

Draco and Snape stood facing each other with faces red and veins popping out from their necks.

"No one cares about you anymore boy! What do you have other than those whose loyalty you forced?" Snape said callously. "No one." Draco hardened his jaw with fury. "Everyone except me; you were once a manipulative child whose parents altered your train of thought and caused pain in every direction you walked. But something changed when I saw you with Granger the other night," Draco straightened up relaxing his tense body. "I don't know how you two got together and honestly I don't care. All I have to say is, stop messing up your life 'cause I'm tired of cleaning up after you." Snape finished and stared at Draco like he was his own son.

Draco didn't say anything and walked away from him. Snape sighed and shook his head; he opened the door and saw students stumble back to their desks.

"Return to your work," Snape ordered.

Hermione looked at the door waiting for Draco to walk out of it but he never did. She looked at Snape who was reading a book on his desk and then back at the door.

"Hermione," Ron whispered. Hermione ignored him and stared at the door. "Just let him go. You heard what he said out there, he doesn't want you," he said.

Hermione looked at him and felt her stomach drop. Snape looked at Hermione and caught her eye. She bit the inside of her lips and started to twirl the ends of her hair. She didn't know why she was nervous but what she did know was that she couldn't sit in this chair with everyone staring at her every second. Hermione got up from her desk, grabbed her bag and walked to Snape's desk. She placed her notebook on his desk and walked out before dashing into a run.

"Hermione!" Ron screamed after her.

"Sit down Mr. Weasley before I issue a detention." Ron glared at Snape and slowly sat down on his seat. Snape opened up Hermione's notebook and saw that the only thing written for the assignment he assigned was the date.

**~o~**

Draco walked into the men's room and threw his book bag on the floor before reaching the sink. His emotions were overpowering him, making him crumble down to the verge of tears.

_No one cares about you anymore boy!_

He looked into the mirror and washed his face from the weakening tears._ What do you have other than those whose loyalty you forced?_ Professor Snape spoke the words of truth. Who cared about him anymore? Draco glanced at his pale reflection. _No one_, Snape's words haunted Draco's mind. _No one_.

Not even Hermione Granger.

**~o~**

Hermione ran down the hall searching for Draco. She didn't know why she wanted to find him but something inside of her told her to. She finally spotted his blond hair at the end of the hallway and dropped her book bag.

"Malfoy!" she yelled.

Draco kept on walking. The last thing he wanted was to see her.

"Malfoy!" she called after him again. He heard her footsteps running after him, but he still didn't stop. He heard her breathe in deeply behind him and felt her hand on his shoulder. Draco quickly spun around and yanked her hand off of him.

"Stay away from me!" Draco screamed at her. Hermione stood still and watched his forsaken eyes grow in fiery.

"Why must you follow me? I don't want anything to do with you. You're an impure, disgracing Mudblood. Can't you see that I was playing you all along? I never thought that you were beautiful, I never wanted to kiss you, and I never even wanted to save you that night. Don't you get it?" Draco bellowed.

Hermione's vision started to blur. "You don't mean that," Hermione said softly.

"Are you deaf?" Draco said harshly. "Merlin Granger, are you even listening to the words that are coming out of my mouth. I don't have feelings for you, I never have!"

Slowly, tears ran down her cheek and Draco just watched them fall. He turned away from her when Hermione started to cry more.

"You're lying Malfoy!" she screamed and grabbed his hand. Draco roughly threw her against the window and let go of her hand. The window broke in pieces and shattered over her. Her face was scratched from the glass and started to bleed.

Hermione groaned in pain as she touched the warm blood from the cuts. She looked up at Draco and grasped everything that was happening. She knows that he just brutally hurt her, but she can't let him go. Draco looked down at her and saw a trail of blood flow down the side of her face. He stood still and looked at the helpless Hermione on the floor. Pain ran through her head as she placed her fingers on her temple. She breathed in hastily and looked up at Draco who was stood frozen in place.

"I warned you," was all he said and turned around.

"Don't do this," Hermione managed to mumble.

Draco closed his eyes and kept on walking. Hermione got up from the ground and walked around Draco to face him. She placed one of her hands on his jawbone and the other on this neck. She searched in his grey eyes for some sympathy but she couldn't find any. Butterflies and pain tingled through her body combining a weird combination.

He felt tears fall on chest and he knew that Hermione was crying once again. He closed his eyes and he wanted to badly to wrap his arms around her but he didn't. He just stood there. Draco opened his eyes and shoved Hermione off of him. Hermione stumbled back but caught her balance. She looked at him with swollen eyes but he just walked away. She watched his back until he rounded the corner and disappeared. Hermione went down on her knees and cried into her hands.

Draco leaned against the wall and heard Hermione cry. He felt like his whole world was falling apart. He was fighting the urge to go back and hug her.

"You did the right thing."

Draco turned around and saw a person in a black cloak stand beside him. He hit his head against the wall and closed his eyes.

"You did exactly what you were supposed to do; play her brittle heart and watch it shatter. It's amazing to see everything go so perfectly planned. Good job for pretending that you liked her back," the person said which came with a laugh. Draco took in a deep breath and glared at the person.

"Malfoy, don't look at me like that. Please don't tell me that you were actually falling for her?"

"No I wasn't," he said slowly. He walked up to the mysterious person and pulled the hood off revealing Pansy. "Trying to kill her wasn't part of the plan," he snarled through his teeth. "I told you specifically to form a way for her to come to me, not the other way around and most surely not to involve my death!"

Pansy smirked and took a step towards him. "Let's just say that you got what you wanted, which was to be in contact with this vermin, and for me to at least view her near death."

She grabbed his chin and made him face her. Draco grabbed her wrist and squeezed it hard. If there was pain running through her hand, she made no sign of showing it. "We made a deal Malfoy. You wanted to ruin Ms. Granger over there and asked me to help you. I said yes, only if you were mine."

"You're mistaking my words from the other night," Draco hissed. "I said that I would do anything you want for one night. Emphasize on the word one, Pansy."

"You know what I want Draco Malfoy," Pansy said seductively.

Draco licked his lips and sighed. He turned Pansy around; her back to the wall and kissed her. No feeling came from kissing her. He didn't feel the same way when Pansy placed her hands around his neck. But he let her think that he did, he had seventeen years' worth of false pretense. The kissing became steamier but Draco felt disgusted with her.

Hermione picked herself up as she heard the bell ring. She quickly picked up her bag and ran around the same corner Draco went. She stopped dead and watched Draco kiss Pansy passionately. He was moving his hands all around her body and she was doing to same. Hermione felt sick to her stomach watching this. She wanted to leave, run away, and forget that she even knew Malfoy but her feet were glued to the floor. Tears streamed down her face.

Draco stopped kissing Pansy when he heard other students' voices. "The rest will come tonight," he said while wiping his lips with the back of his palm. Draco turned the other direction and walked away without looking back.

Pansy fixed her coat and saw Hermione staring at her with fresh tears on her cheeks. A smile formed on Pansy's face and she walked to Hermione.

"He's mine Mudblood, not yours." Pansy shoved Hermione by her shoulder and walked away.

Hermione still couldn't move. People began to crowd around her, asking her what happened to her head but she gave no reply. She just watched her world fall apart in a matter of minutes.


	8. Chapter 8

(November 14, 2010)

"Where were my senses?  
I left them all behind  
Why did I turn away?  
Away  
I wish I could save you  
I wish I could say to you  
I'm not going nowhere  
I wish I could say to you  
It's gonna be alright  
It's gonna be alright"  
_**Save You- Kelly Clarkson**_

Girls snickered as Draco walked past, gazing up at him with envy in their eyes.

_Pansy,_ he shook his head, _that girl cannot keep her bloody mouth shut._ Draco walked through the girl's common room with his hands in his pockets and his eyes set on Pansy's oak door. _Do as she asks and it will all be over soon_, he repeated multiple times in his head. He lifted his hand and knocked on the door.

"Come in," Pansy exclaimed behind the door.

Draco opened the door and the first thing that he noticed were the lit candles placed everywhere in the room. Not only that, flower pedals were scattered around the floor and the bed. Finally Draco's eyes landed on Pansy who was dressed in a silky undergarment and was sitting on the edge of her bed. Apparently, Pansy has a room of her own and her bed is actually two beds placed next to each other. Draco could feel Pansy's eyes looking at him up and down.

"I see you decorated for this evening," he said motioning his hand to the candles.

Pansy shrugged her shoulder and laid down on the bed with her arm holding her head while the other patted the bed. Draco didn't move instead he examined her body. Pansy got irritated and sat up.

"Draco."

She got off the bed and walked over to him.

"Come," she whispered while holding his hand. Draco wasn't going to lie; she did look good in a nauseating way. They started to kiss and Pansy started to take off his coat. Draco didn't make any struggles for her knowing that if he did, a commotion would start right away. They both fell on the bed and were taking their clothes off roughly. The decorations did not match Pansy's attitude what so ever and Draco wondered why she even bothered on decorating. The time was already midnight and half of the candles ran out, but Draco and Pansy were only half done with each other's company.

"Isn't this nice, me and you?" Pansy whispered in his ear.

Draco looked down at Pansy at just stared at her blankly. Suddenly, he started to laugh. Not like those little giggles or chuckles but that hysterical laugh that would scare a child away. Draco clutched his stomach from the pain he got from laughing and rolled off of her and onto his back. Pansy rolled to her side and stared at Draco. Confusion and hurt struck her face. After a few moments Draco stopped laughing and looked at the dim ceiling.

"Was it something that I said?" Pansy asked softly barely above whisper. Draco faced her and stroked her cheek.

"This isn't going to work. I don't love you; I don't even think I ever had feelings for you. You deserve some one better than me." Draco got off of the bed and picked up his pants.

"I love you."

"No you don't. You love what I am; the strength, the power, the money, my body. You don't love me."

"Malfoy, no one could love you," Pansy sat straight up on the bed and pulled the silky cover over her bare chest. "You cause pain to everyone, even to me. Do you honestly think that the mudblood developed feelings for you? No one can but me." Draco continued putting on his shirt. Pansy got off the bed and ran to hug him behind.

"Who knew I had to compete for attention from Granger of all people?."

"I never mentioned anything of Granger to you."

"No you didn't, but I could see it on your eyes." Pansy moved to the front of him and looked up at his breathtaking eyes.

"I'm leaving." Draco moved her hands off of him and picked up his coat.

"If you walk out of that door, you'll regret it," Pansy cried out. Draco turned around and saw pain running through her face. She did love him, but he didn't love her back. He opened the door and walked out leaving Pansy furious on her bed.

Draco warped his fur coat around him while walking down the empty corridors. He faced the path that led him back to his room, but he had other plans for the night. He was going to find Hermione. He had no clue as to why he would see her in the middle of the night on the same day he mentally and physically hurt her. His feet were leading him to the hospital wing where she was staying. Apparently, the cut that she got on her forehead was deep enough to make her stay the night by the orders of Madam Pomfrey.

Hermione lay awake on her back staring at the moon lit ceiling above her. All of her tears were drained and the dried up tears were stained upon her cheeks. Draco hurt her badly and sadly his face was still the only thing that occupied her mind. She closed her eyes and tried the hardest to fall to sleep. Hermione was oblivious to the door of the room being open and Draco who was stepping through it.

Draco saw her lying down in the bed by the window on the far corner of the room. She was motionless and Draco started to wonder if she was really asleep. He walked down to Hermione quietly hoping not to disturb her. He looked over her and saw the dried tears on her cheeks from her swollen eyes. Draco reached and held her hand in his. Hermione's eyes quickly opened and she managed not to let out a scream that was ready to burst.

"What are you doing here?" Hermione said harshly and got her hand away from his.

"If only I knew myself," he said softly.

"Aren't you done ruining my life?" she said turning her face away from his.

"I'm sorry for doing this to you and for the enormous pain that I have caused you."

Hermione turned over and sat up. "And?"

Draco reached and held her hand. "I'm scared of what people would say about us. They already know that we kissed but they mostly thought that was forced."

"That's not good enough," Hermione said while shaking her head. Apologies don't go far in life.

"What else is there?" he asked not knowing what more he can say. He was already showing his vulnerability towards her.

"Tell me how you really feel about me. Tell me why I should forgive and be with you."

Draco took in a deep breath. "Hermione, I want you."

Hermione shook her head.

"I need you."

Hermione shook her head again. Draco looked at her in agony.

"Eight letter, three words. Say it and I'm yours," she whispered.

Draco struggled to let those words escape from his mouth but shook his head in despair.

"I can't," he whispered.

"Leave," she said barley above a whisper and turned away from him. Draco sighed and faced the door.

"I'm sorry, I just can't," he said and walked out.

Once the door closed, Hermione fell on her pillow and started to scream in it.

Madam Pomfrey quickly came out of her office wearing her pajamas and ran to Hermione.

"Child, what is wrong?"

Hermione kept on crying loudly.

"There, there. Everything's going to be okay," she said soothingly while rubbing Hermione's back.

Draco walked down the hall hearing Hermione cry.


	9. Chapter 9

(November 28, 2010)

"Today was gonna be the day?  
But they'll never throw it back to you  
By now you should've somehow  
Realized what you're not to do  
I don't believe that anybody  
Feels the way I do  
About you now"  
_**Wonderwall- Oasis**_

It's been three months since they've spoken.

They walked past one another in the halls with not a glance to spare, no quarrel between Quidditch games, not even a snicker in between classes. It was as if they were truly invisible towardseach other.

Hermione dazed off into the window and watched the snow fall. It amazed her how each snowflake was incredibly unique when there were billions of them. Looking at them helped keep her mind from wandering back to Draco who was sitting just a few seats from her. She didn't know if he still thought about her, she didn't know what went through his mind when she walked by him, she didn't know if he still had feelings for her. If it were just another boy, she would've had done about anything to figure it out, but this boy was different.

Hermione softly sighed and faced forward. The bell rang and students scrambled to grab their bags to leave the classroom. Hermione walked down the aisle, past Draco who was sitting in his seat looking down at his desk while Pansy was whispering something into his ear. Right when she was by him, Draco, for the first time, looked up at her. Hermione stopped walking which caused the line of students behind her to bump into her. Hermione lost her balance and stumbled forward. Draco very quickly, stood up, held his hand out to her stomach and stopped her from falling. Hermione's hair covered her face from view and she looked by the corner of her eyes at Draco. She heard murmurs from the students behind them and none of them bothered to move in front of them to leave the classroom. Hermione placed her hands on his arm, mainly because she needed to hold on to something or else she would be lunging forward. Draco removed his arm from her and trailed his fingers down her arm and slipped a note into her palm. Before she could ask him what it was he was already heading out of the door. Pansy looked directly at Hermione, glaring at her. Hermione knew that she saw him slip the note into her hand, which she was holding tightly in her palm, and hoped that this wasn't another one of his schemes that he liked to play on her.

"Merlin Hermione, were you always this clumsy?" asked Ron. He picked up her books and handed them to her.

She ignored Ron's side comment and grabbed her books. She quickly stepped out of the classroom, rounded a corner and leaned against the wall until she was clear from view. That was only when she straighten out the tiny note in her palm.

_Meet me at the astronomy tower at nightfall._

Hermione read that little sentence over and over inside her head. Why would he all of the sudden want to see her? He was the one that wouldn't dare to even look at her for three months. But still deep inside she was getting a little nervous to finally speak to him again. It was as if the fire that was burned out was rekindling once again.

Hermione took a shower before meeting him. She braided her hair; put on a white turtle neck sweater and her black coat. It wasn't the best looking coat but it was better than nothing. She put on her jeans and wore a pair of simple brown boots. Hermione looked at herself in the mirror while biting her lip. She was nervous and she knew it, but why was the question. Hermione took in a deep breath and walked out of the common room towards the astronomy tower when the moon was at its peak in the sky.

Hermione stood at the entrance and surely enough, he wasn't there. A frown formed on her face which led to doubtful thoughts. She walked to the balcony and looked at the snow fall.

Draco stood at the entrance and watched Hermione daze off to the frozen lake. Even from where he was standing, he could smell the floral scent of the shampoo from her hair. Draco walked softly to Hermione trying not to scare her. He placed his hands around her waist and in that moment Hermione shrieked and stepped away from him with her hand on her chest.

"Are you trying to scare me to death?"

Draco didn't say anything but shrugged his shoulder. That was not the expression he was hoping for.

Both of them looked at each other awkwardly not because this was the place he saved her, or the place that they kissed, but because he lost his words and didn't know what to say.

"Well, I'm here," said Hermione.

"I can see that."

Hermione folded her hands in front of her chest and looked at him.

"You're the one that asked me to come here."

"I know."

Draco didn't say anything else and Hermione got agitated. After a while of not saying anything to each other Hermione gave up and looked out of the balcony.

"Why am I here Draco?" asked Hermione softly.

Draco searched his mind for some words to answer that question. "Because I wanted to see you."

Hermione turned to face him. "Well you saw me, now what?"

"I'm sorry for ignoring you these past few months. I had a lot on my mind," said Draco.

"Why did you kiss Pansy?" asked Hermione. Draco looked at her nervously. _How did she find out?_

"How," Draco started but Hermione caught him off by placing her hand in front of him.

"I saw you two kissing each other after you pushed me into the window. You said you played me all along. What did you mean by that? You said that you didn't even like me, then why am I here?" said Hermione while taking a few steps away from him.

"Hermione, I did a horrible thing to you but that was before I really got to know you."

"What horrible thing?"

"I was angry at you because you sent my father to the Azkaban," Hermione opened her mouth to protest but Draco continued. "Don't tell me that you didn't. You went to the Ministry and told them that my father was a Death Eater and that he had every right to go to Azkaban. Like I said, I was angry with you. I thought that you needed to be pay for what you did. I made a plan for you to fall for me so that then I could leave you heart broken. What I didn't have a part of was forcing you to jump off the astronomy tower. That was beyond my control. Before you speak, let me truly say that I'm sorry for what I did. I had fallen for you too. That wasn't part of my plan."

Hermione looked at him speechless. _It was all a game?_

"How could you? Is my heart a toy for you to play with?" she yelled at him while taking a few steps closer. "For three months you ignored me and didn't even have the heart to tell me?" Hermione stumbled from her croaking voice.

"Hermione, if I didn't care about you, then I would've never came to you at the hospital wing," Draco said while reaching for her hand. Hermione quickly took her hand from his grasp.

"What was on your mind for the past three months that made you not even glance towards my direction?" Hermione said while crossing her arms.

Draco rubbed his forehead as if it started to hurt. "That's complicated. Hermione, let's not talk about me. I have other plans for tonight." Hermione closed her mouth and watched Draco as he withdrew his wand.

"Accio broom," said Draco. In a flash his broomstick appeared in his hand. Draco mounted the broomstick and left some space for Hermione which he patted his hand on. Hermione looked at the broomstick and then Draco.

"Uh, Draco there's something you don't know about me. I'm not very fond of flying and surely you don't think that I would go anywhere with you after what you have told me," Hermione said while eying the broomstick.

"Hermione, it's either you get on with your own will or I would force you to get on."

"You wouldn't."

"Is that a challenge?"

Hermione looked at Draco and then sat behind him. The broomstick hovered a little above the ground which caused Hermione to tighten her grip around Draco's stomach.

They flew out of the astronomy tower into the open air.

"Where are we going?" asked Hermione.

"Nowhere," was Draco's single reply.

A white owl flew towards them which caused Draco to maneuver to the right quickly. Hermione let out a tiny shriek and held onto Draco.

"Just sit back and relax. Look at the wonderful view in front of you," said Draco.

_How does he expect me to relax?_

Hermione looked at the view around her and apparently Draco was right, the view was pretty wonderful. All of the trees were covered with snow which made them look even prettier, there were few clouds above them which caused some of the snow and the full moon was shining brightly making the frozen lake look like a mirror reflecting everything in its view.

"Wow. I didn't know scenery interested you," said Hermione softly while placing her chin on Draco's shoulder. After realizing what she was doing, she quickly pulled her face away from his body. Draco knew what she was trying not to do. He placed one of his hands on hers and leaned back.

"There are many things that you don't know about me," whispered Draco.

_Why does he have to do this to me? Doesn't he sense that fact that I don't want to like him anymore? Why can't I for once and listen to my brain rather than my heart. Obviously my head is telling me to stay away from him but no my heart is being all greedy and wants him too badly._ Hermione looked at the view once more and at Draco, she couldn't help but let her heart win.

"One day I would find all of the things about you Draco," Hermione whispered back.

Draco turned his face to face her and looked into her chocolate brown eyes. Draco couldn't help himself and kissed her. Hermione was a little caught off guard but closed her eyes and kissed him back. His mind went dizzy with the scent of flowers and the kissing but he still didn't stop. He didn't know how this was happening. He was kissing Hermione Granger of all people. The one girl that had the dignity to slap him in the third year, the one girl that kept thinking of him after all of the painful and horrible things that he did to her, the one girl that genuinely likes him.

Hermione placed her cold hands around his neck but instead of giving him goosebumps, her touch warmed his insides. Little by little they started to lean back, which in an instant caused the broom stick to fly straight up.

Draco quickly grabbed control of the broom but when he turned around to look at Hermione, she was gone. Draco looked down and saw Hermione falling to the ground. Draco quickly flew straight down and just a few feet above the ground caught her.

Hermione started to shake uncontrollably and Draco wrapped his arms around her.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Now, you know why I hate flying," Hermione said which came later with a nervous chuckle.

They were hovering in the air once again and Hermione wrapped her hands around his stomach.

"Thank you for saving me," she whispered into his ear.

Draco didn't know to which she was referring to; the time at the astronomy tower or what just happened. He felt her lay her head on his back. Draco turned to face her once again but this time only kissed her on the forehead and faced forward.

**~o~**

Draco walked back to his common room and placed his broomstick by his bed. He could care less if he woke up Blaise or Goyle.

He looked at himself in the mirror and saw how drenched he was from the melted snow. He took off his clothes leaving only his boxers on. He went to the drawer and put on his pajamas. He started to walk over to his bed until he heard a small tapping noise by the door. He walked over to the door and when he opened it, a while owl flew in landing on his shoulder.

"Ah, I knew it was you who was flying towards me," Draco said while taking the envelope from the owl's mouth. Draco took out his wand and sat on the bed.

"_Lumos_," he whispered and read the letter.

_**Draco,**  
I need you to respond to my letters. I need to know if you are willing to go through with this.  
-**Mother.**_

Draco looked down at the letter and knew that he couldn't continue ignoring her, not only because this was the hundredth letter she sent him for the past three months but because he knew how desperately she needed an answer. Draco folded the letter, opened the cabinet from his night table and placed it with the others. He took out the very first letter she had sent him which contained a newspaper.

Draco looked at the front page of the newspaper at his father's picture that was under the headline that read: **A Former Death Eater Considering to be Freed.** He looked down at newspaper and remembered what his reaction was when he first received it three months ago, the day after the night at the hospital wing with Hermione.

Draco, then, looked at the first note his mother sent him and started to reread it.

_**Draco,**  
I should tell you this when you come home, but I think you need to know this now. Of course you have heard of your father was considered of being released from Azkaban, since I have sent you the newspaper with this letter. But as you would know, releasing your father comes with a price from the Ministry. _

_Draco, honey, the ministry allows freedom for your father only if we would ruin our pure-blood status. I know this is going to be hard to understand but the ministry wants you to have a child with a muggle or a mudblood. I know that you're going to ask why you and why having a child. The Ministry choosed you because you're the son that will inherit all the money and that you're the best candidate because you're still young and aren't married. A child because unlike a marriage which you could have a divorce, a child sticks with you forever. I know that this is upsetting but I have considered for you to impregnate a mudblood, at least some of the blood is magical. Please, please be understanding, do this for your father.  
**-Mother.** _

Draco took out a piece of parchment and a quill and finally replied to his mother.

_Okay._

Draco folded the piece of paper and gave it to his owl.

"Give this to mother."

The owl took the note and flew out of the door way.


	10. Chapter 10

(December 05, 2010)

"Oh, it's your light  
Oh, it's your way  
Pull me out of the dark  
Just to shoulder the weight  
Cryin' out now  
From so far away  
You pull me closer to love  
Closer to love  
Cause you are all that I've waited for all of my life  
(We're gonna get there)  
You are all that I've waited all of my life"  
_**Closer to Love- Mat Kearney**_

The warmth of the fireplace eased away the bitter cold for Draco and Blaise.

"Let's hurry. I'm not in the mood to wait in line for butterbeer at Hogsmeade," Draco said while stepping away from the fireplace to grab his scarf off the couch. Blaise nodded his head in agreement and followed Draco to retrieve his scarf from the couch. Unfortunately, his scarf was nowhere to be found. Blaise glanced at Draco, scanning his eyes over his pale face in search for a smirk that signified that Draco was playing a prank on him. Draco's face was hard as stone, no emotions were present.

"Upstairs on your bed. Quickly now," Draco said while fixing his scarf.

Blaise rolled his eyes and walked back upstairs to their bedroom. He immediately found his green scarf lying on the bed. Blaise grabbed the scarf and walked over to Draco's vanity dresser to fix his scarf around his neck. Though, a white parchment caught his eyes. He looked down and saw a piece of newspaper sticking out from Draco's drawers.

Curiously, he opened the drawer and read the title briefly. Blaise examined the front page and saw a menacing picture of a man locked up in chains at Azkaban. He looked closely and saw that it was Lucius Malfoy. _How will his father be freed?_ Blaise thought. He folded the newspaper and was about to place it back inside when he noticed the many letters occupied his draw. Blaise picked up the letter marked as to date and read it.

**_Draco,_**_  
Thank you for being understandable. Don't worry about the soon to be born child, I will find a way to get rid of your child before it causes chaos to the public. No one needs to know about this appalling situation that we will soon be in, but sadly I know that news goes out quickly these days. The minute it will be born, we do the business and dispose of it. See you next week since you will be coming home for the holidays.  
**-Mother.**_

Confusion struck Blaise's face. Was Draco really playing a prank on him? How could he have a child and the most dreadful question was with whom?

"A child?" he muttered. Blaise picked up the last letter of the stack and saw that it was written three months back.

**_Draco,_**_  
__I should tell you this when you come home, but I think you need to know this now. Of course you have heard of your father was considered of being released from Azkaban, since I have sent you the newspaper with this letter. But as you would know, releasing your father comes with a price from the Ministry._  
_Draco, honey, the ministry allows freedom for your father only if we would ruin our pure-blood status. I know this is going to be hard to understand but the ministry wants you to have a child with a muggle or a mudblood. I know that you're going to ask why you and why having a child. The Ministry chose you because you're the son that will inherit all the money and that you're the best candidate because you're still young and aren't married. A child because unlike a marriage which you could have a divorce, a child sticks with you forever. I know that this is upsetting but I have considered for you to impregnate a mudblood, at least some of the blood is magical. Please, please be understanding, do this for your father._  
**-Mother.**

"This is the reason why he's suddenly fascinated with Granger," he muttered.  
_  
_"Blaise, what the bloody hell is taking you so long?" Draco screamed from the common room.

"Coming." Blaise quickly placed the letters and the newspaper back into the drawer and walked downstairs.

"Well?" Draco said.

"It took me a while to find it," Blaise said trying to cover up his lie.

"It sure did. Let's go."

While walking out of Hogwarts, Blaise couldn't take it anymore. How could someone do something like this?

"Malfoy, out of curiosity, are you planning on having children anytime soon?" Blaise asked.

Draco stopped walking and looked at his friend. "Why do you need to know?" Draco said while lowering his eyebrows.

"There's a rumor spreading around that a 7th year has gotten pregnant. Everyone is keen to know who she is and who the father is," Blaise lied. Draco looked down at him. He was lying and he knew it.

"Blaise, there are some things that even you shouldn't know," Draco said and started to walk faster.

**~o~**

Balancing four butterbeers in hand, Hermione walked towards the table in which Harry, Ron and Ginny were sitting in. But before she could reach the table, a hand grabbed one of the jars.

"Hey!" Hermione yelled and turned around to snatch the jar from the lousy thief.

"Are you their servant?" a deep voice welcomed her. Hermione smiled, knowing exactly as to whose voice it was.

"Hey, how are you?" she greeted him.

Draco took a chug from the drink and licked his lips.

"Come, let's go someplace less crowded," he said and took her other three jars and placed them on the counter. Hermione looked around and noticed that this place was far from crowded. There were only three tables filled with student, including her friend's. She arched her eyebrow and looked up at him. Before she could open her mouth to object, Draco grabbed her arm and pulled her towards the door.

"I wonder what's talking Hermione so long with our drinks," Ron asked while rubbing his growling stomach.

Harry turned around to look for Hermione and found her walking away with Draco. "Something tells me that she won't be back in quite a while." He turned to his friends and got up to fetch them some drinks.

"Where are we going?" Hermione stumbled while wrapping her hands around her waist to keep herself warm.

"Somewhere, anywhere, I don't know." Draco looked at Hermione and saw goosebumps spread across her neck. He took of his fur coat and placed it on her shoulder. Hermione was shocked that he would give her his coat but that didn't stop her from putting it on.

"Thanks," she mumbled.

He nodded his head and placed his arm around her waist. They walked to the end of the street and stopped when Hermione spotted a store. She walked up to it and stared at the display window.

"Isn't that dress so exquisite?" she asked and placed her fingertips on the window.

Draco walked closer to get a view of this special dress. It was a white strapless dress that was extremely puffed out from the waist down; around the waist there was a lace pattern which was similar to the bodice. Draco arched his eyebrows in confusion as he looked at Hermione whose nose was touching the window in fascination.

"It would be a dream if I wore this on my wedding day," Hermione said while turning around to face Draco.

Draco imaged her walking down the aisle with that dress on, making every head turn to watch her beauty; but he knew that the lucky guy that was standing at the end of the aisle wouldn't be him.

"It would look wonderful on you, Hermione." He leaned down and kissed her forehead.

Hermione felt butterflies run up from her toes to her head. It was the sweetest kiss she has ever got from a boy. Hermione laced her fingers with his and lead him down a path that was leading to a small forest.

"Where are you taking me?" Draco asked.

"A place far far away," Hermione chirped and looked up at him with beaming eyes.

She led him to a small garden hidden from the rest of the world by the trees. Purples flowers were blooming out from the snow almost in every square inch. Draco examined those flowers while wondering how they could grow when snow was around.

"These are Crocuses. They bloom in the winter so snow doesn't harm them," Hermione said while leading him to a huge rock by a hallow tree.

Draco sat down first and then placed her on his lap. Hermione couldn't help but giggle like a little girl as he did that. She never imagined that her heart could fill with so much pain and happiness from the man before her. With his finger, Draco slipped back the loose strand of hair behind her ear; he trailed that finger down her cheek bone to her chin; then he leaned in and felt his lips meet hers. Her pulse pounded so hard but she didn't mind. She felt the touch of his cold hand move towards her back which sent even more goosebumps up and down her body. The kiss became more passionate and she couldn't help but smile inside her head. The kiss felt so natural, so real, and so perfect.

Draco placed his hand behind her neck eager to keep kissing her since she was the only escape from his reality. It seemed to him that if he even loosened his touch from her, then she would simply float away like a leaf that was being pulled by a breeze. Their lips seemed to be in synced perfectly together.

Hermione began to lean forward towards him and he placed his back to the hard rock. She was on top of him and he couldn't help but smirk under their kiss. Hermione felt him smirking and smiled to herself. She ran both of her palms down his inner arms until they reached his hands where she synced their fingers together. She stopped kissing him and placed her nose to his. They looked into each other's eyes both getting lost within them.

He saw her future in her brown eyes. He saw her getting married, having children, saw her family sitting around the fireplace with the Christmas tree right next to them and sadly he watched it fade away because of what he would be doing. This relationship was a fraud. That's all it would ever be. Draco closed his eyes shut and reopened them. Hermione was still looking down at him but her head was tilted sideways.

"What's wrong?" she whispered.

"Nothing's wrong," he said while kissing the tip of her nose which made her giggle again while she closed her eyes.

"We should get going," Draco said.

Hermione made a pout which made him smirk. Draco sat up while Hermione wrapped her legs around his waist.

"I like it here," she said. "With you."

Draco placed his hands on her back and softly kissed her lips. He had to speed up the process and he knew exactly how to do it. To say those dreadful three words that she badly wanted him to speak, would push the relationship forward. Guilt struck his stomach and he prepared himself for the struggle.

"I love you," Draco said. Hermione looked at him in awe. She quickly wrapped her hands around his neck.

"I love you too."

With a smile, she unwrapped her legs from him and stepped onto the snow while wrapping his fur coat around her. She stuck out her hand to him and without hesitation he took it and they walked back to Hogwarts, hand in hand.


	11. Chapter 11

(December 12, 2010)

"In my head there's only you now  
This world falls on me  
In this world there's real and make believe  
And this seems real to me  
And you love me but you don't know who I am  
I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand  
And you love me but you don't know who I am  
So let me go, let me go"  
_**Let Me Go- Three Doors Down**_

The dim candles awakened Draco's shadow as he trailed his finger on the stem of the books while walking towards the forbidden section at the library.

The ancient sign that informed the trespassers that they were in the depths of the forbidden section sent tingles within his body. The thrill of getting caught was nothing compared to the knowledge he would soon know about the dark magic. Just a few more steps and his curiosity would soon be dispersed.

"Malfoy," a voice called behind him. Draco closed his eyes and dropped his shoulders. It took all his will power not to scream in frustration.

"What do you want, Potter?" Draco spat.

Silence filled the distance between them. Then, footsteps reached Draco.

"I demand to know your motifs as to why you have suddenly developed feelings, or lack thereof, for Hermione?" said Harry in a proud stance as he pointed his wand at Malfoy.

Draco glared at this weakling before him. Did he actually think that Draco would explain his reasons?

"Walk away Potter before I force you to," said Draco through his teeth.

"Stay away from her, Malfoy," Harry said while taking a step closer to the former death eater.

"Over my dead body," Draco sneered and withdrew his wand out from his coat.

"That won't be an issue," Harry muttered.

Draco clenched his jaw together to the point that it burned. He was in no mood for Potter's little mind games; he had far better things to do. The two boys stared at one another waiting for one of them to throw the first spell.

"Harry, where are you?" whispered Hermione from behind a few bookshelves. "I understand that the slightest thought of you attending the Winter Ball tonight gives you hives, but Ginny won't be pleased when her date abandons her."

Harry gave one last glare at Draco and stormed off to Hermione. Draco inwardly groaned as the thought of going to the ball tonight. Perhaps if he had overcome with hives, he wouldn't have to go.

He looked down at his watch and sighed once again. It was either he went and pleasured his date, or lose the chance of ever returning his dearest father back to the Malfoy Manor where he belonged. Draco Malfoy was a key example of how others were able of controlling his life.

**~o~ **

Hermione lifted the bottom of her dress and let out a deep breath before walking down the staircase. She didn't understand why she was so nervous; the idea of what other people thought about her no longer occupied her mind. Perhaps it was because Draco Malfoy was going to see her in this luxurious attire of hers.

"Hermione, you look exquisite!" Luna shrieked while clapping her hands excitedly.

Hermione bowed her head in politeness and walked down the agonizing steps. She kept her eyes on the floor, not wanting to slip and fall. Her dress was painted blood red. It was a backless and hugged her every curve, but flowed down to the ground. The dress was cut out on the sides while red satin wrapped around her waist. Her hair was pulled back in a milkmaid braid that wrapped around her head and her makeup was simply nude since her dress took up all the attention.

"You look beautiful too, Luna." Hermione reached the end of the staircase and smiled shyly at her friends.

"Come on, let's go dance," Ron said while taking Lavender's hand. Harry held Ginny's hand and Neville was holding Luna's. The three pairs walked ahead to the ballroom with Hermione trailing behind. She looked around the ballroom hoping to see a certain blonde head, but it never did. Her heart began to sink. Draco promised her that he would be there to escort her and be her date.

Hermione shook her head in disbelief and held back the tears that were ready to fall.

"You actually assumed I would miss this?" a soft voice whispered into her ear as two strong hands grabbed her waist.

Hermione jumped in fright but didn't turn around. She opened her mouth to question his reasoning for being late, but then quickly closed it as two warm lips kissed her neck. Draco continued kissing her neck and trailed kisses up until his lips met hers.

"You look stunning," Draco whispered and placed his forehead onto hers. Hermione blushed and smiled as she gazed off onto his mysterious grey eyes. Draco detached himself from their embrace and placed one hand behind his back and the other out in front of him.

"May I have this dance?" Draco asked with a bow.

"You may," Hermione laughed and curtsied. She reached out to grab his hand and was led out into the ballroom that was filled with the many couples dancing with one another. A waltz echoed through the room, as well as unsatisfied groans, and Hermione looked uncertainly at the dance floor.

"Draco, I don't know how to dance the waltz," Hermione murmured.

"No worries, I do." Draco, with such grace, led Hermione into the middle of the dance floor and twirled her around before beginning the dance.

"You'll have to trust me. Just follow my lead," Draco smirked and started to dance. The two of them moved in sync and danced as if they were one. Hermione watched in awe at how graceful Malfoy can be. Of course it made sense to her that Draco Malfoy would know how to dance to such a superior style of dance, a dance of the wealthy most would call it, but for her to actually be in the presence of this new found beauty amazed her. She was more eager than ever to find out what else there is to this certain boy named Draco Malfoy.

Draco pulled Hermione closer to his chest and placed his hands around her hips as the song changed to a more upbeat genre. Hermione smiled and placed her hands around his neck and lowered her head onto his shoulder. The two of them swayed their bodies in a slow rhythm, even though the song that was blasting through the speakers was nowhere near a slow song.

"You dance so beautifully," Hermione whispered and breathed in his cologne.

"My mother insisted that I needed to learn a cultured dance, I objected at first but she won that war. Let's just say, you can never object to my mother." Draco took in a deep breath as the thought of his mother appeared in his mind, but closed his eyes shut not wanting anything to ruin the moment he had with Hermione.

"I wish you'd open up like this more often. I like knowing the things that not many people know about you," Hermione said softly.

Draco shook his head, not wanting to talk about him or his family. "There's nothing more for you to know about me," he muttered. "It's best if you don't."

Hermione stopped dancing and looked at him. "But I want to know more about you, Draco. It's just that you keep yourself so hidden. It's hard enough that I can barely know what you're feeling."

Draco signed and took her hand into his. "I don't want you to read me like an open book, Hermione. I have already opened myself to you quite vastly."

Hermione shook her head softly and took her hands away from his grasp. She stopped dancing and crossed her arms over her chest. "Draco, I don't want to date a wall."

"You dare compare me to a wall?" Draco huffed.

"Yes, and a very bland one in fact," Hermione said while raising her voice in frustration.

"Hermione, don't start tempting me into a fight," Draco reached out and grabbed her hand while she started to turn away from him.

"Or what, you'll hurt me again like your beloved aunt?" Hermione snarled harshly. Draco glared at her and squeezed her arm. Hermione sighed and pulled her arm away from him. Draco took in a deep breath and watched Hermione rub her arm. It was then that he noticed the faint scar on the inside of her arm, inscribed _mudblood_.

"Goodbye Malfoy," Hermione whispered and turned away from him.

"Hermione wait!" Draco yelled though he stood where he was.

**~o~**

Harry watched Hermione run past him and out of the ballroom. Confusion filled his mind and he glanced down at Ginny.

"They got into a fight again," Ginny sighed and nodded her head at the lonesome Malfoy standing at the middle of the dance floor.

Harry stopped dancing and withdrew his wand from the inside of his coat. He was ready to pounce at this certain ferret for hurting his best friend's heart. Ginny shook her head and lowered Harry's wand.

"I know you want to stop it, their relationship. Protect her from him, but you don't see what I see," Ginny whispered and glanced at Malfoy. He was lost in deep thought, while looking at the door of the room that Hermione vanished into. "It's not just that she makes him a better person. She does, but, he changes her too. Draco Malfoy challenges her, surprises her. He makes her question her life, beliefs."

Ginny smiled and touched Harry's raging jaw to calm him down. "His love is pure," she continued and watched Draco walk towards the room Hermione was in. "He'll always be good for her."

Harry shook his head in amazement at the words that Ginny spoke from her mouth. He doesn't know how she could see all of this; all he could see is the evilness that lurks on Malfoy's shoulder. Harry kissed her forehead and continued dancing with Ginny; just for once, he'll let them collapse on their own terms.

**~o~**

Hermione sobbed while sitting on a patterned rug in front of a blazing fireplace. She didn't know where she ran off to, but it excluded her from Draco. She wept into her hands not understanding what wrong she had done. All she wanted was to understand him, know his past, and listen to his innermost stories. She knew that Draco was hard to read, but she can't be in a relationship with a rock.

A soft knock was patted on the door and Hermione quickly dried up her tears. She didn't want to look like a wreck when a professor would question her about why she was in this room. Hermione turned her head and saw Draco close the door behind him. She bit the inside of her lip to keep herself from bursting out in rage. She knew if she did, then she'll push him farther away.

Draco tucked his hands inside his pockets and walked swiftly towards Hermione. She turned her head back to the view of the fireplace, not wanting him to see her like this.

"The fireplace is divine, don't you agree?" Draco said softly to break the silence. Hermione nodded her head slightly, but didn't say a word. Draco frowned as he saw her wipe away a tear.

"Darling, there's no need for you to cry. It was all just a tad argument, nothing more." Draco walked closer to Hermione and sat down next to her, though he faced the door while she dazed off into the fireplace.

"All I want is to know more about you and make sure you're not this cold blooded snake that you make yourself to be," Hermione sniffled. Draco closed his eyes. If only she knew how right she was. Draco was a snake, a very deceiving one in fact. He reached out and let his fingertips brush hers.

"It's hard Hermione, I'm not used to letting people in," Draco whispered the truth.

Hermione licked her lips and turn her head to look at him. "Allow me to be the first," she said and placed her hand onto his. Her touch sent shivers up and down his spine and removed his hand from beneath hers. Hermione closed her eyes at his actions and turned back to the fireplace.

"If I let you in, all you'll want to do is run," Draco said.

"Draco, there's nothing that you could do that will make me run away from you in fright," Hermione said.

"You don't understand!" Draco spat in anger.

"Then make me understand," Hermione said timidly.

Draco shook his head and dropped his head into his hands. He didn't want to do this menacing plan anymore. He didn't want her to be hurt any longer. Draco lifted his head and from the corner of his eye watched Hermione gaze off at the fireplace. She was so naïve; he envied that. Draco reached out into his pocket and pulled out a ring with a green gemstone on it.

"Hermione," Draco whispered and twirled the ring in his hand.

"Yes Draco?" she asked and looked at his tense face. Hermione curled her eyebrow and moved closer to him. "What is bothering you?" she whispered.

Draco took in a deep breath and shook his head. Hermione touched his jaw softly and stared into his eyes before leaning in to hug him. He wrapped his arms around her body and hugged her back.

"Will you marry me?" he whispered gently.


	12. Chapter 12

(December 20, 2010)

"Everyone thinks that I have it all  
But it's so empty living behind these castle walls  
These castle walls  
If I should tumble if I should fall  
Would any one hear me screaming behind these castle walls  
There's no-one here at all, behind these castle walls  
Nobody knows I'm all alone  
Living in this castle made of stone  
They say that money is freedom but I feel trapped inside it all  
And while I sit so high up on a throne  
I wonder how I can feel this low  
On top of the world it's beautiful  
But there's no place to fall"  
**_Castle walls- T.I. Feat Christina Aguilera_**

Will you marry me? The most dreaded and emotionally bearing question a man can ever ask a woman. Though, Draco Malfoy let it slip right past his tongue in ease.

Hermione uncurled herself from Draco and stared at his eyes in disbelief. Was he playing a game with her? She couldn't tell, but somehow the thought of trickery seemed foolish as she took a glance at the dazzling ring before her.

"Draco," she whispered not knowing what else to say.

"There's no need to say more," Draco murmured and lifted her chin so that she could look at him once more. "I know that I have just put an insanely amount of pressure on you, but I need you to understand something. I don't want you to give me an answer. Not because I don't want to hear a rejection, but because I'm worried that you'll say yes."

"Draco, I don't understand what you mean." Hermione arched her eyebrows in confusion, and then her face softened as he traced his fingers in her palm.

"I know you don't and that's what's killing me inside. Hermione, I love you. And it's because I love you that I can't hurt you anymore." Draco sighed and closed his eyes. "I hope in time, you'll answer the question that I've asked you, and you'll answer yes but not to someone like me." He opened his eyes and placed the ring into her palm and covered her fingers over it.

"Draco, yes," Hermione whispered. She got on her knees and leveled her eyes to his. "I will marry you."

Draco shook his head in agony and tightened his hand over hers. He reached inside his coat pocket and pulled out his wand. "I'm sorry Hermione; for all that I have put you through. But, I needed the truth of your answer. I wanted a rejection, so that then I'll know that you'll find a way to forgive the harm that will soon happen. If you are truly in love with me, then redemption will take many hurtful years."

"Draco," Hermione started but Draco hushed her.

"I'm so sorry Hermione." Draco took one last look at her somber eyes and raised his wand towards her. "But it's best if you didn't remember me asking that question. Obliviate."

**~o~**

A poor miserable soul sat before the powerful Narcissa Malfoy. A soul that was quite eager to cover up any type of sustainable emotions that were hidden beneath his ruthless grin. An emotion full of somber and regret as to the actions that were soon to be unfold. She was delighted to finally see the face of her son during the holidays, but this face she loath. Identifying a false face was one upside that came with the Malfoy name.

She swirled the glass filled with wine dark as blood before taking a sip. Her only child was raised in a household that valued the positions of power, yet she felt powerless watching her son not touch an inch of his dinner. Of course, the atmosphere in the room wasn't as homey like other households, nor was it as friendly, but it did serve a feeling of purpose. What she instructed her son to do was malevolent, though she had no choice. There was no other way of bringing her beloved husband from the treacherous placed called Azkaban. Though, she felt remorse knowing the circumstances.

"Draco," she started but discontinued. She didn't know how to begin. In her mind, she knew she was ruining his youthful life.

"Mother, like I have said before, there is no need to be worried. I have set through with this plan and I will succeed. Don't add worry to a situation that forbids such a thing," Draco said boldly after taking a sip of his wine. The alcohol warmed his insides, yet he needed something stronger to forget such a scheme. What was it with his family that forced them to redeem themselves towards dark power? Then again, why was he always so eager to read within the forbidden sections at the library?

"To ruin the pureness of our bloodline is a grotesque punishment. The upcoming generations will be poisoned by such a scandal. All that power and wealth that we built, will soon be demolished." Narcissa looked down at her plate and though of her husband. For a second, she considered of letting her husband stay in prison. But as she lifted her head and took a quick look around the house, that thought seemed foolish. For a woman to stay in such an abandoned home by herself was already a bloody punishment, for her to be alone for the rest of her life would be torture. She glanced up at her son and pain struck her body. What a painful thing for a mother to do. Lead her son to a deadly trap.

Draco took in a deep breath and closed his eyes. He didn't want to do this. He was confused. He kept telling his mother that he could handle this, that he had a plan. But he was in no mood for it to play out. Nor did he have the chance to foretell that he had fallen for his victim.

"Why, mother if you may answer, did the Ministry choose Hermione Granger?" Draco murmured while keeping his head low.

"Quite simple, because they'd assume she wouldn't do such a thing. We all know how much of a hard head that mudblood can be. The ministry thought it would be a challenge. Yet, we have proven them wrong, haven't we Draco?" Draco grew uncomfortable at his mother's words and she could sense it.

"I have come up with a solution to this plan. When the baby arrives within this world, cast a memory charm for her to forget giving birth to such a disgraced child. She would have no memory of you or the child, and we would have Lucius back in arm's length," Narcissa said coldly.

Draco slammed his hand on the table which caused an echo bounce up and down the empty walls of the mansion. "Mother, do you see me as this intolerable person to do such a thing," Draco said.

"A mudblood is nothing, filth, powerless. I will not have the Ministry take control of my life. They already took my husband. Do you know how it feels to be alone in this beautiful home, be covered with wealth that burns your skin just because of the memory of how you received the things, throw lavish parties but have no one to talk too, have a wonderful son that you can't even see every day? I'm alone, Draco, in my very home," Narcissa said and raised her arms around the dining room. "I need my husband back on my side."

Narcissa got up from the dining table and walked towards Draco's seat. She placed her hands on her son's strong shoulder. "What is this plan that you constantly mention but have no care to explain?" she whispered harshly into his ear. Draco tensed up, knowing that his mother was testing him. She always had the power to do so. She claims that she is just as heartless as her husband, but Draco knows that family is the prized gem in her collection. One of the reasons for her sturdiness to get the plan done.

"I have made her fall in love with me. Then, as the time comes, it would be easier for me to sleep with her," Draco said bitterly, not wanting to have this conversation with his mother. Narcissa smirked and grabbed her wine glass off the table. With her finger, she traced the brim of the glass while watching her son's face.

"What comes after?" Narcissa asked with a grin.

Draco opened his mouth, but no words came out. He hadn't thought about that. What would he do after the child's been conceived? Charm her into obeying his motifs?

"You have grown affectionate towards her, haven't you?" Narcissa asked, even though she already knew the answer. Draco tried to object, bashing at his mother for thinking such things, but had failed miserably.

"You have fallen into your very own trap, darling. I saw it in your eyes the very minute you stepped into this house. Don't try to hide it, mothers know everything."

"I am not in love, mother." Draco stood rigid.

"Deny all you might, but you know I'm right. I understand that you had no intentions of having any fondness towards her, but you will suffer the consequences either way. You may not know about them just yet, but you will have to choose between two paths. The one that you will choose would have to be sufficed," Narcissa said and turned to face Draco.

"Now for some more accommodating news, you won't have to bear the pressure much longer. You must impregnate Ms. Granger tonight. The Ministry has put a time limit and the end is vastly approaching." Narcissa placed her hand on his chin. "Choose wisely my dear."

**~o~**

Draco walked out into his bedroom balcony and stared at the night sky then at his solemn neighborhood. He looked down at a parchment with his wand held over it. Two dots appeared, one that said his name and the other, Hermione. The map gave the directions Hermione's whereabouts, as well as his own. The ring that he has given her was charmed. Draco closed the parchment and placed it inside his pocket, he has made his decision. Draco took in a deep breath and apparated.

He appeared in a small muggle bedroom. The walls were beige with pictures on the walls. A small rectangular window was open making the white curtains move rapidly. To his left there was a bookshelf filled with books, so tight to each other that you can't even fit a paper in between. A full sized bed was placed in the middle of a huge wall and a person was fast asleep in it. The border of the bed was decorated with white Christmas lights, acting as a nightlight.

Draco walked over to the bed and watched Hermione sleep soundlessly. He leaned over her bed and softly outlined her features with his finger. He sat down on the bed and placed his hand on her bare shoulder. Before he could second guess himself, she woke up. She pulled the covers close to her, screamed and fell off the bed. Draco heard footsteps running up the stairs.

"Draco, what the bloody hell?" she hissed while wrapping her sheet over her chest.

Before he could answer, Hermione pushed him off the bed and he fell onto the floor. The door opened and a man entered the room. He stood armed with a bat, ready to pounce on the assumed victim. Moments later, a woman appeared out of breath.

"Sweetheart is everything alright?" her mother asked while examining the room.

"Of course, why wouldn't it be?" Hermione mumbled while rubbing her eyes in attempt to look asleep.

Her mother lowered her bat and sighed. The parents looked around the room once more, avoiding checking underneath the bed, and kissed their daughter goodnight. Once the door was closed, Hermione sat on her bed and patted the space next to her.

"What are you doing here Draco?" she asked.

"What, you're not happy to see me?"

"Of course I am," she said softly and reached for his hand. Draco felt the ring that he has given her earlier at Hogwarts. Before she could question him even more, he leaned in and kissed her soft lips. Without hesitation, she wrapped her hands around his neck and kissed him back.


	13. Chapter 13

(December 23, 2010)

"Who do you think you are?  
Running around leaving scars  
Collecting your jar of hearts  
Tearing love apart  
You're gonna catch a cold  
From the ice inside your soul  
Don't come back for me  
Who do you think you are?  
It took so long just to feel alright  
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes  
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed  
'Cause you broke all your promises  
And now you're back  
You don't get to get me back"  
**_Jar of Hearts- Christina Perri_**

**Warning:** This is the scene where Hermione and Draco go farther into their relationship, if you know what I mean. Wink. Wink. Them going to the next level is quite important in the story, so don't think that I'm writing a sex scene out of no where. This is a PG-13 rated story, so I didn't write in way too specific terms. If you're over the age of 13, which I hope you are, this won't be a problem. But, if reading a sex scene isn't your cup of tea, then you may skim over up until the end. Please, please do not skip this chapter, there are very crucial details at the end of this chapter!

Draco looked down at this beauty before his eyes; he couldn't break the stare. Her chocolate brown eyes were twinkling by the moonlight that was entering through her bedroom window. A few months ago, it would've been hard for Draco to imagine that this was the exact place he would be, and with whom. Basically, everything had changed.

Draco placed his hand behind Hermione's head and gently laid her onto the bed. She gave a small smile as he did that, knowing that his softer side had finally came out. She wrapped her hands around his neck and twirled her fingers at the bottom of his hair before leaning in for a kiss.

The kiss was devoured with passion and desire for one another. In moment's time, they parted their lips from each other for air. It was then that Hermione knew what would happen next if they continued kissing. She formed her lips into a thin line and stared at Draco's grey eyes, looking for information that would possibly make her decision better.

"We don't have to do it you know," Draco whispered while taking her hand into his and rubbing his finger in her palm.

"I want to," she whispered back. The moment she said those words, Draco hesitated, but then began to kiss her again. Draco fixed himself over Hermione by placing his knees beside where her thighs and hips met and his hands on the sides of her head. Hermione stared into his eyes and many thoughts ran across her mind, but the most dangerous one was of how badly she wanted him to continue kissing her.

As if reading her mind, he leaned down and started to leave trails of kisses on her neck, cheeks, and lips. The way he played with his kisses infuriated Hermione. It was like she was being struck by lightning every time he touched her. The kissing became more intense and both of their bodies were overtaken by a dangerous flame that threated to consume them both.

In the mist of all of the passionate kisses, Draco stopped and kissed Hermione softly on her forehead. She closed her eyes and couldn't control the sudden moan that escaped her lips as his hard body pressed down against hers. She felt like she was being swept away by waves of emotions and she knew that he felt the same way; emotionally and physically.

Draco just couldn't get enough of her. He leaned towards her neck and started to leave a trail of kisses to her heart. Hermione grabbed his shirt and began to take it off. Draco stopped kissing her neck and helped her take his shirt off. With her fingers, she unbuttoned his shirt and looked up at him as she did that. They both smiled as the shirt finally came off. Hermione ran her hands around his torso, letting her fingers wander around his toned body.

Goosebumps prospered all over her body as he tugged on the hem of her shirt. For a brief moment she got nervous. No man has ever seen her in all of her glory before, hence how easily a man can identify the innocence off of her. She was never placed in a situation with a boy that came within this deep path. Draco looked down at her in worry and started to part his lips to say something but she quickly kissed him before he could speak. She was going to do this.

Her fingers found their way to his pants and she started to unbutton them. The next few moments they were both filled with desire for one another. He wanted her badly as much as she wanted him. He let her touch her in a way that no man had touched her before. Her innocence he could see and he was glad for that. He knew that she had no other man in her bed but in her own way she made him move in ways that no girl had done before.

Hermione lay on top of his naked body, not being shy anymore. She kissed his lips, and then left a trail of kisses on his bare skin up until his belly button. She looked up at him and tilted her head to the left. He had his eyes closed and he was biting his lower lip. She knew what he wanted her to do, but she wasn't going to. Instead she kissed his belly button and began to laugh. Draco flipped her around and he was now on top of her.

"You love teasing me, don't you?"

Hermione gave him a smile. But that was alright with Draco, he knew that she wasn't going to do all of the dirty deeds that Pansy always did. Draco leaned closely to her face and kissed her nose.

In a matter of minutes, Hermione lay under Draco as he went inside of her. She bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself was screaming out the pain that she was experiencing. She felt a trail of blood streaming down the inside of her leg from her loss of innocence.

He lifted his hand and placed the hair on her face behind her ear. He leaned forward to her face and placed his forehead against hers. "I'm sorry," he said softly as he saw a small tear fall from the outer corner of her eye fall.

_For everything,_ he thought to himself.

**~o~**

Draco got off of her bed and walked to his pants pockets and pulled out a small bottle. He walked over to her side of the bed and poured it's continents into the glass of water. Hermione laid on her bed, with her sheets wrapped around her, and watched Draco as he did this.

"Here, drink this, it would make the pain go away," he said handing the glass over to her. Hermione sat up on her bed, and the sheets slid off her body. She didn't care and took the glass as Draco sat down on the side of her bed. She took a sip and laid back down on her bed, with her face on the pillow. Draco took the glass from her hand and started to remember the moment that he and his mother shared with this small elixir.

_Narcissa walked over to a cabinet that held many bottles filled with potions. She ran her finger along the bottle searching for one in particular. She found what she needed and turned towards Draco._

"_Here take this," she said and held it out to her son._

"_What's this?" Draco said while twirling the small bottle in his hand. _

_"It is a potion that will allow her to agree with everything that you say." Narcissa turned her back to her son and engaged herself with closing the cabinet's doors. _

"_Why would I need this?" Draco said uneasily._

"_Why? Honey, imagine what would happen when you tell her that you slept with her and gave her a child just to free your father? Give her this potion after you're are done and tell her that it's for the pain. As far as I'm concerned, I believe she is still a virgin. Once she drinks it, she will do whatever you say. You will tell her to lie to the ministry and say that she was madly in love with you and wanted to have this child. Just make sure that she drinks it. It has to be in her body or else it won't work."_

_Draco held the bottle tightly in his hand. Narcissa walked up to her son and placed her hand on his shoulder._

"_Good luck, son."_

_Draco nodded his head and walked over to his room._

Draco sat at the corner of her bed, holding the tiny bottle in his hand. He ran his hand through his blond hair. He couldn't believe that he was actually doing this. He got off of her bed and started to put on his clothes. He walked over to Hermione, whom was sleeping, and pulled the sheet over her bare back. He, once again, placed her loose hair around her face behind her ear and kissed her softly on her lips. He held his forehead onto hers.

"I love you, please don't think I don't," he whispered softly and kissed her nose. Not knowing that he could have these emotions, he felt a tear run down his face and land on Hermione's cheek. He looked at her sleeping body one last time, knowing that she won't be the same when she comes back from winter break.

He walked away from her bed and walked to the window. He didn't look back and apparated back to his house.

**~o~**

Hermione opened her eyes when he finally left and sat up on her bed. She ran her fingers on her cheek, feeling the tear drop that landed on her. She grabbed her shirt and quickly put it on. She looked down at her wet pillow in disgust and got out of bed. She picked up her glass of water that was contaminated with the potion and threw it out the window.

She sat down on her bed with her hands on her face. She hated him and loved him at the same time. He made her so angry. Hermione stood up and started to pulled her sheets off her bed and put them in her laundry basket. While taking off her pillow case, she started to cry.

Did he really think that she was that stupid? Did he really think that she would think that was a pain killer potion? She was smart enough to let him think that she drank it, but instead while going back to sleep she spit it out onto her pillow.

Hermione walked over to her cabinet and pulled out a brand new pillow. Once the bed was all fixed and the room was all cleaned, she walked over to her book bag and pulled out two letters and climbed back into her bed remembering a dreadful memory on what was supposed to be a wonderful night.

_Hermione poked her head behind wall, gazing down at the wonderfully dresses students in their luxurious attire for the dance. Her eyes were on the prowl for a certain blonde haired boy was supposed to be escorting her down. "Where is he," she whispered beneath her breath and continued staring off into the distance. _

"_I highly doubt that he would show up."_

_Hermione quickly turned around and saw Blaise standing behind her dressed in a fashionable black tuxedo. She shook her head, hoping that he was wrong and gazed out once more at the crowd. "He's going to show up. He promised."_

_"Do you always have faith in people that were born to be cruel as him?" Blaise said to the irritated Hermione. _

_"What do you want Blaise? I know you don't like me, so let's cut the small talk, shall we?" Hermione spitted out in anger. It was bad enough that her date was showing up late, it's even worse when her date's best friend is scolding her. _

_"I have come to give you this. Consider it as truce between our horrid bickering over these past 7 years" Blaise took something out of his pockets and held it towards Hermione. She took it cautiously, not truly trusting his motifs. _

"_What is it?"_

"_Two letters, both are from Draco's mother. He doesn't know that I have these and he doesn't know that I read them. I just thought that you should know what he was up to," Blaise said. _

_Hermione opened the first letter and started to read it. Everything that was surrounding her seemed so far away as she read the letters. After she finished reading the last letter, she felt herself heat up. She didn't want anything to do with him ever again._

Hermione lay on her bed staring up at the ceiling with the letters under her pillow. She knew what he was up to, and she still let him do it. Why didn't she stop him, why did she let him do what he did to her tonight?

Hermione started to cry while clutching her stomach. She cried about loving him, about hating him, about how stupid she was, how she would become a mother and how on earth she was going to explain this to her parents. She fell asleep when there were no more tears left to fall.


	14. Chapter 14

(December 26, 2010)

"Even when I cross the line  
It's like a lie I've told a thousand times  
I don't wanna dream about  
All the things that never were  
Maybe I can live without  
When I'm out from under  
I don't wanna feel the pain  
What good would it do me now  
I'll get it all figured out  
When I'm out from under"  
_**Out from Under- Britney Spears**_

All couldn't help but stare at the girl that passed by with an armful of books. Some just smirked in disgust knowing that only Hermione Granger would enjoy that much of undesirable amount of books as Christmas presents. It didn't surprise her either that not one decent soul came out and helped her with her books as they fell onto the floor from lack of balance. Nor did she mind it, for she had grown into one strong woman who chose not to care for other's rudeness. The whistle of the Hogwarts Express pierced through the station in urgency to inform that it would be leaving soon. Hermione quickly picked up her books that were scattered across the floor, but as she did so, her head started to spin in circles. She closed her eyes shut and walked towards the train, ignoring the grunts from those she bumped into.

"Hermione," bellowed a shrill voice. "Over here!"

She looked straight ahead and saw Luna waving her hand wildly over to her direction. Hermione smiled and walked up to Luna.

"Good morning Luna," Hermione said and sat down at the couch within the compartment. Luna soon followed and sat across from her.

"Splendid is it?" Luna asked as she took a glance out the window and saw the vastly approaching storm clouds heading towards their direction.

"I've always enjoyed storms," Hermione said with a sigh and averted her attention to the window.

She focused on the hint of reflection she got from the window and wonder crossed her face. Her beauty no longer appeared for it was trapped behind a haggard appearance. Hermione closed her eyes and placed her head against the cold window. She blamed her image for the lack of sleep she had been getting from her over excessive crying that occurred during the nights. Though, she knew that the tears were only part of the reason for her appearance. The other half dealt with a certain man. In a daze, she watched the train station blur by.

"Hermione!" Hermione jerked back towards reality and looked at the familiar faces before her.

"Merlin, how many times do we have to call your name to catch your attention?" Ron huffed while placing his luggage on the shelf. Hermione looked around and saw the smiling faces of Harry, Ron, Ginny, Luna and Neville. She couldn't help but give a faint smile and think about how all of them could even fit in this tiny compartment.

"Is everything alright?" Harry asked while taking a good look at Hermione. "You seem a little pale and your eyes are swollen. Hermione were you crying?"

Hermione gently touched the outside of her eyes and they were in fact, swollen. "I just went through a lot of personal issues this winter break." Hermione sat up and smiled. "No worries, I'm fine, truly."

"Hermione, where on earth did you get that ring?" Luna asked as her blue eyes gleamed at Hermione's ring.

Hermione looked down at the ring Draco gave her and blinked, then quickly used her other hand to cover it up. She meant to take it off right after he gave it to her on the night of the dance, which for some reason she could vaguely remember.

"The devil himself, I bet." Neville leaned closer to her and examined the ring. "Malfoy has the same exact ring."

"Why would he give you his ring?" Luna asked. After a quick moment of thinking, Luna's eyes grew big as a thought came across from her mind. "Did Malfoy propose?"

Hermione shook her head eagerly. There was no way Draco had proposed to her. Why would he? All she was to him was a target. Though, she couldn't remember much of that night.

"Of course not and even if he had, I would've said no. I'm much too young to be getting married now," Hermione said in her knowledgeable tone. Hopefully, her friends would see how ludicrous that idea was, more so than the fact that she might be pregnant with his baby. Perhaps, she was the ludicrous one.

"I don't trust that boy," Harry said sternly to Hermione, who just ignored him completely. Unfortunately for him, she couldn't care less whom he trusted or didn't. Hermione looked out the window and watched the snow covered trees.

"But you do love him right?" Luna asked with some hope of doubt in her tone and placed her hand gently on Hermione's hand. Hermione shivered from her warm touch and looked at her as if she met her for the first time. Before she could even reply, Hermione started to get dizzy.

The room around her began to spin and the familiar faces twirled around her in worry. Hermione clutched her head with her hands and leaned forward to her knees to stop the ongoing migraine, but that only made the room spin faster and faster. Gravity gave up on her and she fell onto the floor. She felt a pair of hand underneath her underarms, and lifted her up. She heard faint cries of worry that went from ear to ear. Hermione felt her hands fall on the cold hard floor once more and she felt something rise up in her throat. Before she could stop, she threw up on the floor, feeling sorry for the shoes in front of her.

**~o~**

Draco Malfoy walked up to the table where Blaise and Pansy where sitting in. Pansy looked up with hope in her eyes that he would sit down by her and let her play with his hair like many times before, but instead he walked past her and sat down in front Blaise. He wouldn't look at Draco as he sat down but looked out of the window. For a few moments the fellow Slytherins sat in silence at the back of the train.

"Well, this is fun," Pansy muttered under her breath. Draco rolled his eyes and placed his head on the table while Blaise continued to look out of the window in silence.

"What's all that commotion?" Pansy said breaking the silence and turning around towards the front of the train. Students crowded the halls and a certain compartment, making it hard for Draco to view the scene.

"Move along," Professor McGonagall said while softly pushing students aside.

Draco shrugged and was about to go back to sleep when he saw Professor Snape hold a body in his arms. Draco sat up quickly when he noticed who the girl was. Before Pansy and Blaise could ask where he was off to, Draco was already pushing younger students out of his way. A few students snarled at him, but quickly apologized when they realized who he was and ran away before he could hex them.

Draco reached the compartment and saw Harry, Ron, Luna and Neville sitting across from one another, whispering softly to each other. Harry looked up and saw Draco looking at them for a brief moment.

"You'd be dead by now if it weren't for Hermione's consent! You shall pay for whatever you have done to Hermione," Harry snarled angrily at Draco and took a step towards him, yet Draco overshadowed his height. "Did you charm her? Poison her?"

He expected a witty comeback from Draco but none came because he was gone. Draco briskly walked down the hallways hearing Harry yell at him, but he could care less for his attention was at a certain muggle born.

"Professor!" Draco screamed as he reached Professor Snape, who was closing the door behind him. Draco was about to open the door but Snape blocked him.

"Go back to your compartment, Draco," Snape snapped.

"Not until I see how she is doing," Draco replied and reached for the doorknob once more but failed.

"What are you doing Malfoy?" Snape asked.

"Trying to get inside that room," Draco spat and glared at his old friend.

"What are you doing with your life?" Snape asked. Draco remained quiet and stared blankly at the door in front of him. It wouldn't surprise him if Professor Snape knew about his mother's bold plan. He was a welcomed man within the house anyways. Mother would make sure that he would succeed with the plan in any cost.

"I thought I knew, but not anymore," Draco said weakly. Professor Snape sighed and placed his hand onto his shoulder.

"Your parents, Draco. It has and will forever be the one thing that keeps you from truly being great. Just look at what they have done to your life. It's time for you to take matter into your own hands." Professor Snape squeezed his shoulder and then walked away.

Draco glanced at the door once more and squeezed his eyes shut. He knew Severus was right, but his family will always prevail with or without him. Yet, there was a level that even the most powerful members will find themselves in, his family dug a ditch quite deeper than that level.

He walked back to his compartment, not daring to look at the students eyes that were watching him cautiously. It almost seemed that he was Lord Voldemort himself. Walking in, Blaise was still looking out the window like before and Pansy was waiting for him like a lonely dog. None of them said a word to each other and continued to do nothing.

Half asleep, Draco felt a person poking his shoulder. "Quit it," Draco said coldly while shrugging his shoulders.

"Not until you hear what I have to say. I have been thinking about it the whole train ride," Blaise said.

Draco yawned and sat up.

"Where's Pansy?" Draco asked while blinking and rubbing his eyes as if the sun was shining right into them.

"Getting dressed, but that's not the matter. Malfoy, I know what you're doing." Draco turned to his friend, wearing the most prized emotionless mask. "And I want you to stop," Blaise finished.

"Do inform me on what I am doing, Zabini," Draco growled softly, not pleased with the subject his friend chose to speak about.

"I have read the letters that your mother sent you." Draco began to get rigid. "You're using Granger for your father."

Draco sat in silence, glaring at his closest friend. "Clearly, you don't know what I am doing," Draco finally said. "No one does."

Blaise looked at Draco all confused. "I read the letters, Malfoy."

Draco got on his feet, reached for his luggage and took out his robes. "But not between the lines."

"Don't go all philosophical on me Malfoy," Blaise continued. "I gave the letter to her."

Draco stopped. "To whom?" he asked below his breath.

"Hermione Granger," Blaise said. He tightened his grip on his wand, being cautious to his friend's reactions. He waited for Draco to take out his wand and cast an unforgivable curse at him right then and there but none came. Draco turned around and faced his silently trembling friend.

"It was nice knowing you, my friend. It's good to know I had one good friend around here," Draco said and shook Blaise's hand. He walked out of the compartment leaving Blaise dumbfounded.

**~o~**

It was the first day back from winter break and here she was, lying on a hard medical bed at the hospital wing. It started to appear as he secondary home for the many amounts she was in this room. It was already night fall and she was still starving even though all of her friends brought food for her to eat. She lay nervously on the bed waiting for Madam Pomfrey to return and ask her the final questions. A door opened and she heard the echo of Madam Pomfrey's footsteps approaching fast.

"Alright dear, you say you were feeling nauseated on the train ride?" she asked while sitting down at the corner of her bed and Hermione nodded her head.

"But it could just be motion sickness," Hermione said hopefully.

Madam Pomfrey shook her head. "There is only one cause we have left and I sure do hope that's not it." Madam Pomfrey took out her clipboard and a quill.

"Now dear, have you had sexual intercourse this past month?" Madam Pomfrey said professionally.

Hermione took a deep breath and started to blush. It was so unfair, it hadn't even been a month since she lost her virginity and here she was being questioned about it.

"Yes."

Madam Pomfrey looked up at her in disbelief and sighed. She got off of the bed and walked over to the medicine cupboard.

"I want you to go to the bathroom and pee into this cup," she said handing it over to Hermione. She took it without a question and went to the bathroom to pee in a cup.

**~o~**

Draco stood in front of his window with his unpacked luggage next to him. He looked at the frozen lake and wondered how the creatures were still alive during the winter season and he looked at the fresh snow on the field twinkling by the moon light. He hated to admit this but he is going to miss this place. Draco walked over to his desk and took out a piece of paper and a quill.

_Forgive me mother, for I have failed. _

He folded the paper and called out for his owl. He didn't have to worry about being overseen by his roommates because all of the Slytherins were too busy partying and were too drunk to realize that classes start tomorrow morning.

The white owl flew into the room and took the letter from Draco's hand.

"Give it to Mother," Draco said.

The owl nodded his head as if he understood and flew away. Draco walked out of his common room with his Slytherin attire off and headed for the Hospital wing.

**~o~**

Hermione looked at the cup not knowing what to do. Her urine turned blue when she peed into the cup. The cup itself was magical so she had no idea if it meant that she was pregnant or not. Hermione walked out of the bathroom hoping to see Madam Pomfrey by her bed but she was nowhere to be found. Hermione walked over to her bed and placed the urine filled cup on the bed side table.

"Hermione," a soft voice called her name that sent goosebumps all over her body. She knew that voice and this wasn't the time she wanted to see him.

Hermione turned around and like always was right. Draco was behind her. When she looked up at him, he looked to different. It seemed that his whole soul was drained out of his body. Hermione took a step away from him, almost knocking the table behind her over.

"You shouldn't be here," she said softly, not knowing if Madam Pomfrey was in her office or not.

"I need to talk to you," Draco said and took her hand. He led her to her bed and they both sat down facing each other.


	15. Chapter 15

**Dear Readers,**  
Wow, I am actually finished with this story. This story, by far has been so much fun to write. Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day and read this story. Thank you so much for the reviews and thanks to the amazing people that have been reading this story from the very beginning. You guys are amazing! The song in this chapter is a cover of 'Dream on' by Areosmith, I choose this version because the voice is so enchanting and it fits perfecting for what you guys are about to read. I hope to have many reviews of what you guys think, the good or the bad. Also, if you have any other ideas for what I should write for my next story, feel free to tell me :) So, until next time,  
-**Natalya**

* * *

(December 28, 2010)

"Every time that I look in the mirror  
all these lines on my face getting clearer  
the past is gone  
it went by like dusk to dawn  
isn't that the way  
everybody's got their dues in life to pay"  
**_Dream on- Kelly Sweet_**

"I already know what you want to talk about," Hermione said and stood up. "I want you to leave, now."

She stepped away from her bed, trying to get far away as possible from him. She didn't want to see him. She was extremely upset and her emotions were already heightened.

"Hermione, please," Draco said softly and reached out for her hand. He felt the tips of her fingers but as quickly as he felt it, they were gone.

"Don't touch me Malfoy. I am asking you nicely to leave." She turned around and pointed to the door.

"You know I can't do that. I am not leaving until I explain." He too stood up and took a few steps towards Hermione. She felt his presence behind her.

"There is nothing for you to explain." Hermione turned around, her face already heating up. "I read the letters. You used me Malfoy, for your father. Do you have any idea of how I feel at this very moment? I feel betrayed, alone, gullible, and least of all stupid. Everything that we had was a complete lie. I don't even know if you even had some feelings for me. Was anything, at least one moment, real?" Hermione looked up at Draco with watery eyes.

Draco looked down at her and he felt as horrible as she felt. He didn't say anything for a moment and they both stood in silence, looking at each other.

"What happened to you at the train?" Draco asked.

"Don't try to change the subject, Malfoy."

"What happened?" he asked again.

"I'm not answering until you tell me why. Why did you do this? Couldn't you just choose another muggle born and let her suffer? Why me?"

"The answer was in the letter," Draco said silently.

"That's not the answer I want. That's not the real answer, Draco. That was your mother's answer. I want yours." Hermione took a step towards him, rage overwhelming her entire body. Draco didn't say a word.

"Pitiful, you can't even answer me!" Hermione raised her hand and was just millimeters away from smacking him in the face. Draco caught her hand midair and tightened his grip around her wrist.

"Because I love you damn it!" Draco screamed out. He let go of her roughly and Hermione lost her balance. She stumbled backwards and knocked over her bedside table that contained the cup with blue urine. She was too stunned to do anything as she watched the cup fly off the table and shatter on the floor. After a few moments she turned around and looked up at Draco in shock.

"If you loved me so much then why did you do it?" Hermione asked quietly as she looked down at the floor. She wasn't mad anymore. Her rage of anger was now gone and she felt like cuddling up in a corner and cry her eyes out.

"I didn't." Draco walked over to her and held her in his arms. They rocked back and forth together as she cried in his arms.

Hermione stopped rocking with him, dried up her tears and recited his words in her head.

"Stop lying," Hermione said into his wet shirt from her tears.

"I'm not lying," he said.

Hermione extended her arms away from him and looked at him questionably. "Yes you did," she said with a trace of anger in her tone.

"Hermione, look at me." He took her by the shoulders and held it firmly so that she would look at him. He looked into her eyes. "I am not lying."

Hermione shook his hands off her shoulders and walked away from me.

"Yes you are! You did everything that your mother wanted you to do in that letter, Draco! You slept with me and you even tried to make me drink some type of potion for which I am guessing will make your plan go by smoothly! So, don't you dare tell me that you did not lie," she shouted angrily. She crossed her arms over her chest and waited for his reply.

"For once, Hermione, you're not fully right. Yes, my mother knew that I was going to sleep with you, but I didn't do it for her, I did it because I love you," Draco said.

"That potion that you put into my water, the one that you said would help ease the pain, well guess what, I didn't drink it," she said proudly with a smirk. Draco froze in place. Hermione uncrossed her arms and smirked once more when she saw his face drop.

"You wanted me to drink a potion that would most likely make your whole life easier. I'm sorry Draco but I'm tired of you lying to me at any chance you get. For once, I thought that you could just love me. You say you do, but how am I even supposed to believe you. I feel like I don't even know you," Hermione said, her voice breaking when she said the last few words. Tears ran down her cheek and they felt like they were burning her face.

Draco felt his heart drop as he heard those words fall out of Hermione's mouth. He took in a deep breath and turned around. Hermione opened her mouth to tell him to turn around but she couldn't say it.

"I discarded the potion my mother gave me the day I got it. The potion I gave you was a birth control potion. It was going to keep you from having my baby." Draco felt his eyes water up and he started to walk his way to the door.

Hermione covered her mouth from screaming. She sank down to her knees, letting a puddle form on the ground from her tears. She looked up and saw Draco already by the door watching her cry.

"I love you, Hermione, and I always have." He looked at her one more time and left the hospital wing.

Hermione started to cry hysterically on the floor not knowing how many minutes went by. She felt warm hands pick her up to her feet and she hoped that they were Draco's. When her vision wasn't blurry anymore, she saw that it wasn't Draco, but Madam Pomfrey who helped Hermione to her bed.

"My dear, what happened?" she asked in worry.

"I fell," Hermione lied shakily.

Madam Pomfrey shook her head knowing that she was lying but didn't pressure on that subject matter.

"Well, did you pee in that cup as I asked you to do?" Madam Pomfrey asked.

Hermione nodded her head.

Where is it?"

Hermione took in a deep breath to calm down her nerves.

"It fell."

Madam Pomfrey wanted to ask how and why but she didn't. Instead she formed her lips into a thin line.

"What color was it?" she asked.

"Blue."

Madam Pomfrey gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. She closed her eyes and softly shook her head.

Hermione didn't have to ask if she was pregnant or not. She already knew by her reaction.

"What are you going to do?" Madam Pomfrey asked.

"Keep it."

When Madam Pomfrey finally left after asking her a million of questions, Hermione lay in bed looking up at the ceiling of what she was going to say to Draco.

**~o~**

A week had gone by when she was finally let out of the hospital wing. She walked down the hallway alone to her potion class. She entered the room and it quickly became quiet. Professor Snape was in his desk looking up at her with a book in front of him. Hermione faced the whole class and noticed that every eye was watching her. She silently walked to her seat and sat down. The whole class was still looking at her as she took out her notebook and pen.

"As you were class," Professor Snape said and continued to read his book.

Hermione took the chance to take a look at Draco's seat but it was empty.

Hermione poked Ron on his arm.

"Where's Draco?" she whispered.

"I don't know and I don't care," Ron said and returned to his book.

Hermione rolled her eyes and looked at Harry. He sighed and wrote something down on a piece of paper and handed it over to Hermione. She opened it up and read.

_He hasn't been here for a week._

Hermione stared at the sentence in confusion and replied.

_Why would he be skipping Professor Snape's class?_

She threw the paper to Harry's desk and she saw him scribbling something down. He folded it once again and threw it back to Hermione.

_No one has seen him for a week. He's gone._

Hermione stared at the last two words as if they were written in a foreign language that she didn't know. Hermione crumpled up the papers in her palms; her eyes already beginning to water. Hermione stood up making the chair squeak on the hard floor. She walked down to Professor Snape not caring if everyone was looking at her. She had to know if what Harry said was true. She reached his desk and leaned close to him.

"Is he really gone?" Hermione said silently so that no other students could hear.

Professor Snape looked at her in odd. She was simply not at her best. He opened his cabinet and took out a newspaper.

"Yes," he said while he handed it over to Hermione.

Hermione took the newspaper and before she could fall into pieces in front of everyone, she ran out of the room not bothering to get her things. She ran away from the class, away from the other students, away from all of the whispers that people kept giving.

Hermione ran up the steps of the astronomy tower and when she reached the threshold, she fell on the floor on her knees. The newspaper went flying from her hands and landed a few feet away from her. Hermione crawled her way to the newspaper and leaned her back against the circular brick wall.

**THE YOUNG MALFOY BOY WENT MISSING!  
**_The night on the first day back from winter break, Draco Malfoy has been listed missing from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardly. Fellow Slytherins have said that they saw him walk up to the common room after dinner._

"_I thought he was in his room the whole night," said Blaise Zabini, a close friend of Draco Malfoy._

_Another student stated otherwise. The student, who wants to stay anonymous, said that he saw him leave the common room once and never return. The student said that he would most likely be with his new interest, Hermione Granger. _

_We wanted to question Hermione Granger for some details but Headmistress Professor McGonagall wouldn't allow it. _

_Narcissa Malfoy, mother of Draco Malfoy, said that she won't stop searching for her only son until she has found him and that she would do whatever it takes to get him back home safety. She had also said that the last thing Draco Malfoy wrote to her was a one sentence note that read: "Forgive me mother, for I have failed." Narcissa won't discuss what that letter meant and wouldn't give any further comments. _

_While some are searching for the young Malfoy boy, some are rejoicing. Few shop members won't let posters of the young boy up on their windows saying that he needs to be lost and that he is just doing this for publicity like his father, Lucius Malfoy._

_All in all, Draco Malfoy if you're reading this, your mother wants you home and hopefully you will come home so that we could stop this search. _

Hermione reread that tear stained article over and over again. She looked at his picture and wondered why he did this. She has his baby; he could get his father out. But at the back of her mind, she had a feeling that he doesn't even know she is pregnant with his child. Hermione kept crying and hoping that he would come back and they could go away together. But she knew that, that won't happen because of the last thing that she had said to him. Hermione ripped the paper, hating herself for pushing Draco away. She told him to leave about a hundred times and he did.

**~Epilogue~ **

**_Five years later_**

A little girl with long curly hair that was tied up in a pink ribbon stared up at the chocolate frogs in Honeydukes Sweetshop. She touched the jar with her small finger, wanting to eat one so badly. A door opened and was banged loudly on the wall behind it. A few shoppers look at the women with concern for opening that door so harshly.

The women stopped at the doorway looking for a certain blonde haired girl. She finally found the little girl who was standing on a chair with her hands on the counter and her chin resting on them with her eyes looking at a jar.

The women walked briskly over to the little girl and then silently, when she was just a few feet away from her, she held her arms out and was just about to give a fright to the yellow dressed girl.

"I know you're behind me mommy," the little girl said in a high voice.

Hermione smiled and picked up the girl and placed her bottom on the counter.

"What did I tell you about running away from me like that, Antoinette?" Hermione said as she looked into the big gray eyes of hers.

Antoinette dangled her feet off the counter top and laughed.

"What if I couldn't find you or if somebody else took you away," Hermione said sternly to the laughing little girl.

"That wouldn't happen mommy. You can always find me in here," she said and turned her head to the chocolate frogs. "Next to the yummy frogs."

Hermione rolled her eyes and picked up the little girl and placed her on the ground.

"We're leaving," Hermione said and started to walk away. Antoinette stayed back with her arms crossed and started to pout.

"What about the yummy frogs?" Antoinette asked in a sad tone.

"Yummy chocolate frogs don't like to be eaten by naughty little girls like you," Hermione said.

The little girl stomped her foot on the ground but the mother kept on walking. After a few moments, Antoinette gave up and ran after her mother. Once she reached her, she grabbed her mother's hand.

Walking out of the Sweetshop, Antoinette started to play with her mother's ring. "Where did you get this ring, mommy?" Antoinette asked.

"Why must you ask me that question every day? I'm sure you already know the answer from me telling you a hundred times."

"Because then I know that I actually have a daddy," she said softly.

Hermione sighed and looked down at her daughter. Every time she looked down at her daughter, images of Draco always appeared in her mind.

"Your father gave me this ring, honey."

Without asking anymore questions of her father, Antoinette went skipping along to the flower bush by the forest.

"Don't go too far, darling. Or else the monsters in the forest will get you," Hermione screamed when Antoinette reached the flower bush and started to pick the flowers.

"Don't be silly, mommy. There's no such thing as monsters," Antoinette yelled back.

Hermione smiled and walked towards her daughter. She sat down on the grass and picked a white daisy from the bush.

Something flew out of the forest that made Antoinette shriek and run to her mother.

"I thought you said there weren't any monsters in the forest, Antoinette?" Hermione asked her daughter with a smile.

Hermione looked up and saw a white owl circle the sky above her, and then it flew towards her. Antoinette stood up and started to dance around the flowers like the white owl.

"Look mommy, I'm an owl!"

But Hermione wasn't paying attention to her daughter anymore, only at the owl. The white owl landed on the grass and hopped onto her leg while biting the string that was tied to an envelope.

Hermione untied the knot and the bird flew away, chirping. Hermione opened the envelope. Inside it was a piece of parchment that had two dots on it. One had her name while the other had Draco Malfoy's. Her hands started to shake as she examined the parchment.

"What is it mommy?" Antoinette asked and looked over her mother's shoulder.

Hermione stood up and started to walk into the forest. Antoinette stood still for a moment not wanting to go into the forest but when her mother disappeared into it, Evelyn ran inside the forest running right into her mother.

"I thought the forest ate you!" Antoinette said and wrapped her arms around her mother's legs. Hermione looked down, smiled and grabbed her daughter's hands.

The two of them walked deeper into the forest while Antoinette started to sing.

Hermione stopped and looked down at the parchment. Her dot was right next to Draco Malfoy's dot. Butterflies started to fly around her stomach as she looked up. Then she frowned because there was no one else other than a huge rock. Hermione remembered this place. It was the place she took Draco, and they sat on that big rock, kissed and said that they loved each other for the first time.

Hermione walked closer to the rock and saw a piece of paper laying on it with a ring on top. Antoinette ran to the rock and started to jump so that she could sit on it. When she finally managed to get on the rock she looked down at the ring.

"Look mommy, it's the same ring that you have!"

Hermione picked up the ring and noticed that it was and she knew whom it belonged to. Antoinette picked up the paper and handed it over to her mother. Hermione took it and opened it up.

_Darling,  
The words "I'm sorry" cannot describe how truly sorry I am for leaving you, lying to you and hurting you. I want you to know that not one day has passed without me thinking about you. I love you and I always have. I want us to be together forever but I know that won't happen.  
Please know that I never meant to hurt you like I did on the last night we saw each other. I have watched you some nights and saw the beautiful girl that you have brought into this world. I know that she was born for this plan of mine but I can't do this to her.  
My time is running out now as I write this letter to you. I have come into agreement with the Ministry for letting my father out without hurting you ever again. Please don't come and try to stop them, for it will not work.  
Farewell my love_.  
_Draco_

Tear streamed down her cheeks as she read the letter. Hermione felt her knees giving up on her and she fell on the grass by the rock. Hermione shook her head in disbelief as she cried.

"He's dead."

"Who's dead mommy?"

"Your father has been dead for four years. He wrote me this letter on the day he was going to die and it took this long for me to actually get this," Hermione said more to herself as she remembered that night.

_Hermione sat in a rocking chair by the fireplace with her baby in her arms. An owl flew into the room with a newspaper attached to its leg. _

_Hermione stood up and placed the sleeping baby into its crib for bed._ _She opened the newspaper and gasped._

**THE YOUNG MALFOY BOY HAS BEEN FOUND BUT ONLY TO BE KILLED.  
**_Draco Malfoy has been sentenced to death by the Dementor's kiss in return for the freeing of his father. The boy showed up at the minister's footsteps telling him that he would do anything to free his father. At 9 pm this night, the boy died no matter how much his parents argued for this not to happen. When Auros asked for his final words, he said "I will not take my love away." _

_Hermione couldn't continue reading the article anymore. She threw the paper into the fire and cried herself to sleep that night. _

"I'm so silly for thinking that I was going to be seeing your father," Hermione cried into her daughter's legs.

Antoinette patted her mom's hair.

"But he is here."

Hermione shook her head in despair.

"He's with us every day. He's our shadow mommy. See," Antoinette said and pointed to her shadow. "He is always following us and watching us. He will never leave you and me."


	16. Chapter 16: A Few Words

November 04, 2012

Hello, my lovely readers!

There are a few things that I would like to say and well, there's no other way to say it. I was thinking about writing an alternative ending and I actually started to write it, but then at the end I stopped because well the ending was perfect the way it was. I must say that I never intended for that to be the end, I had so many other ideas to put in this story and I believe it didn't involve for one of them to die. For instance there was going to be a wedding.

But, I felt that ending it this way would be more powerful and meaningful.

I have made a book trailer for this story which you may watch on Youtube. Copy and paste this part after Youtube's URL: watch?v=U98YBlCbTDQ

This story is also published on my other site called Wattpad. On that site, I have original stories that I have published and a DRAMIONE one-shot which isn't on fanfiction.

Thank you once again for reading my story and please be sure to check out my others!

-Natalya


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